Campaign 2 (Astragar) Episode 20: Bad Bargains

[00:00:31] Speaker A: Welcome to carrots and suffering. I am Nate, your dungeon master. Today, we're going to do something a little different, starting with this, our 20th episode of campaign two, season three. Our mid role is, for a bit, going to be mythology from the empire of Astragar, mostly because I got excited and started writing some, and that's world building, so now it's coming to you. Also, my players were extra funny this time, so I left in a little bit more table banter in the second part of this podcast episode, shortly after the Midroll. Don't forget to leave us a rating and review. And with that, let's get into it. Last time on carrots and suffering, our heroes investigated a double murder and a disappearance. [00:01:18] Speaker B: They were murdered a bit excessively. Not super excessively, but somebody wanted them dead, not just because of what they had. [00:01:27] Speaker C: What types of wounds? [00:01:29] Speaker B: Short swords. Three in poot and four in autumn. [00:01:32] Speaker C: What weapon would the case have been for under autumn's bed? [00:01:37] Speaker A: A broadsword. [00:01:38] Speaker C: Turns out putt made cursed weapons, and that's why he didn't do much work. [00:01:42] Speaker B: Oh, well, so that probably explains the nature of the objects that are missing, potentially. [00:01:48] Speaker C: I mean, we don't know what autumn's was, but if there was a shield in Putt's shop, it may have some malevolent magic on it. [00:01:56] Speaker B: Well, I determined it was likely a human who killed both of them. It was somebody bigger than both of them, but not big enough that I would suspect a centaur. So that lines up. Hoot looks like he struggled. Autumn looks like she did not. [00:02:09] Speaker A: Then they dropped in on the centaur camp and discovered the centaurs were possibly not the aggressors and find them guarding an interesting location. [00:02:18] Speaker D: Our main goal is just to find out why they're attacking the town, because town doesn't seem to understand why. So perhaps eve's dropping can answer that for us without putting ourselves in danger. [00:02:30] Speaker C: Can we have Sadie do a larger circle to see if there's anything else interesting in this area, Billy? [00:02:38] Speaker B: Sure. [00:02:38] Speaker C: It's this nice sunny day. [00:02:40] Speaker B: Brulain thinks as much to Sadie. [00:02:42] Speaker A: Behind the Centaur camp, near where the thorns are, there's a little cave. Our heroes negotiated with the centaurs and found out they were hunting the mayor, who they believed hired the attackers, who murdered their centaur leaders before the mayor then fled into a cave where horsemen dare not travel and all is not safe. [00:03:03] Speaker D: In that cave, the town is under. [00:03:05] Speaker B: The impression that you are attacking them unprovoked. [00:03:09] Speaker D: Yes, it's true. They say that you've been attacking us, and we just wanted to come and find out why. I suppose ambassadors, we mean no harm. [00:03:21] Speaker A: He was seen entering the cave as we returned. We are waiting for him to come back, but several humans have made an attempt to perhaps rescue him. [00:03:34] Speaker B: Oh, shit. [00:03:35] Speaker A: Yeah. There's a beautiful song just rolling softly through this cave, echoing down, and you realize that there's nothing dangerous here. There is actually a beautiful singer on the other side of this cave, and perhaps you'd like to meet them. Through the escape tunnel, the heroes find a castle that has been scooped up and thrown down, forming a crater of rubble. It's filled with a colossal dragon skeleton and two harpies who make off with Cretan's gem encrusted golden statue. A beam of light pierces it through the chest, and it falls into the thorns. [00:04:10] Speaker B: All right. And then with the spiritual weapon on the other, she'll move the spiritual weapon to the other one and miss for its turn. [00:04:20] Speaker A: It is going to screech and dive. After its fallen sister, it disappears into the thorns. [00:04:36] Speaker B: The thorns are coming over that wall. [00:04:39] Speaker A: It would be dangerous. [00:04:42] Speaker B: I don't think she's going to do that. No. [00:04:46] Speaker A: Okay. [00:04:47] Speaker B: I don't think she's going to risk that. [00:04:49] Speaker A: That Harpy's dead. Zerus, anything up your sleeve? [00:04:52] Speaker C: Is it just 40ft to the lip of the. [00:04:55] Speaker B: Yes, but there are thorns growing over that, so, like, if you touch them, you're in deep shit. [00:05:01] Speaker C: What do you mean I'm in deep shit? If I touch them? [00:05:03] Speaker A: The thorns cause high levels of madness. If you touch them, that is permanent. [00:05:09] Speaker B: Gauge how mad you already are. Not anger. Madness. [00:05:17] Speaker C: That's unfortunate. [00:05:21] Speaker A: Yeah. Okay. [00:05:22] Speaker C: I won't. I will just go after my dagger. [00:05:25] Speaker A: You find it. No problem, Creedon. [00:05:29] Speaker B: It's a shame about the bird statue. Yeah. [00:05:34] Speaker D: One day I'll figure out how to locate it, maybe get it back. I'll just have to remember that I lost it, but I'm not going in there. Are you crazy? [00:05:44] Speaker B: Yeah. I guess I'll go to the chamber pot opening, and she will hold her nose and look down over it. [00:05:52] Speaker A: Yeah. Lots of what you would describe as guano run down it. Most of it dried, but it drops down probably 20 ish feet to a pile of guano. And then it seems to take a hard left turn further into the thorns. [00:06:08] Speaker B: Are there footprints in the guano? [00:06:11] Speaker A: Oh, yeah. Those are real obvious. [00:06:13] Speaker B: Okay, well, I do not believe they were lying about him going down there. [00:06:17] Speaker C: All right. [00:06:18] Speaker D: I would love it if we could wait just an hour so I can mentally prepare and also be more ready to cast spells. [00:06:27] Speaker B: We can wait for the mare. [00:06:28] Speaker D: Went down there a while ago. I don't think an hour is going to make. [00:06:31] Speaker B: It might be wise to wait for an hour to see if the one that lives comes back. [00:06:36] Speaker D: Yeah, that, too. Maybe we can get the bird. [00:06:40] Speaker C: Yes, we will hide and. [00:06:42] Speaker B: I'm sorry, Nate, I'm trying to remember what you said before. There's this chamber opening, and then they said the front door was basically just flying. Not correct. There's not another way out of here? [00:06:52] Speaker A: Not that anybody indicated. [00:06:54] Speaker B: Okay. She will look for another way out. [00:06:57] Speaker A: You would have to climb up around the edge with the thorns. [00:07:00] Speaker B: No, not doing that. I meant, like, within the basin that we're in. [00:07:05] Speaker A: No, the basin is a basin of rubble. [00:07:07] Speaker B: Okay. She would like to investigate the dragon skeleton. [00:07:11] Speaker A: Okay. [00:07:11] Speaker B: See what she finds. [00:07:13] Speaker A: What would the role be? We'll just start with investigate. [00:07:16] Speaker B: Okay. 16. [00:07:19] Speaker A: It has two cracked ribs. It looks like it suffered some sort of serious pre mortem wound to the ribs, but it looks like it happened before the creature died, not after. [00:07:31] Speaker B: Can she tell what did it? Like a sword or. [00:07:34] Speaker A: No, not all of the flesh injury is gone. Right. You can just see something cracked these bones apart. [00:07:43] Speaker B: Okay, would a history roll tell me whether I know a story about this particular dragon or in this location? [00:07:51] Speaker A: Yeah. Good. You have advantage. [00:07:54] Speaker B: You are alive for natural 20. [00:07:56] Speaker A: Okay. You don't need the advantage. But you were alive for this. [00:07:59] Speaker E: In fact, with the natural 20, you. [00:08:01] Speaker A: Were even in the area. [00:08:02] Speaker B: Oh. [00:08:03] Speaker A: You actually tended to the bodies from this incident, which is why you remember it so well. So there was a gold transport after the thorns had come up about 40 years ago. And it was problematic when some sort of supposedly flying creature stole the cart of gold and flew off with it. A team of heroes assembled to go deal with this. You didn't get to meet the heroes because they didn't die. The caravan guards did, but, yeah, the team of heroes flew off or read a rode off, apparently confronted this dragon, killed it, supposedly. But it flew off into the thorns as it was dying and was never seen again. Neither was the gold. And that's all you know. [00:08:54] Speaker D: But nothing about a castle dropping out of a sky. [00:08:57] Speaker B: Yeah, I was going to say, does she know where we are? Because she's been to Fenrir before. [00:09:02] Speaker A: There was a small border keep here from the early days of when Fenrir was placed. But this is like a six 7800 year old small keep that is smashed here. I don't think you've ever been to it. It wasn't noteworthy enough for you to stop. It was sort of like one of those castles in the countryside. [00:09:26] Speaker B: Vulain gets very contemplative as she moves around this dragon and examines and examines the bones and looks around the rubble and she says, this is something I remember. There was a dragon that stole a cart of gold being transported and heroes mortally wounded it and it flew into the thorns. This must be where it landed. That was 40 years ago. [00:09:52] Speaker C: So the mayor's after the gold? [00:09:55] Speaker D: Could be. [00:09:56] Speaker B: The gold was never seen again, along with the dragon. Maybe he was hoarding it here. Maybe he was hoarding it down in the chamber pot. I mean, no one wants to look down there. Well, I can thomaturgy Civic's vapor rub to mask the smell. [00:10:15] Speaker D: That would be great. I'll clean us all off when we get through and probably myself every 5ft. [00:10:22] Speaker C: Sounds all right. [00:10:23] Speaker A: Okay. You have no problem climbing down this cracked masonry chimney? Almost. It's just what happened to be left from a castle being smashed. But it's very easy. Hand and foot gripping the guano makes it a little tricky in places, but someone seems to have cleaned it off by falling at some point. When you get to the bottom, there was a pile of decades of bird guano here, and clearly there was something living in it because there is some fleshy tentacle mass that has been just torn apart here. Looks like something chopped it up pretty seriously. Is it fresh, some kind of big weapon? Fresher than you'd ever want it to be. [00:11:09] Speaker B: Okay, so this happened like within the last few days? [00:11:12] Speaker A: It's definitely rotting and then the tunnel goes off. [00:11:17] Speaker D: I don't think I would know enough to know what that is. Just trying to think about how tough is the mare size this thing up. Does it look pretty tough? [00:11:28] Speaker A: You can roll me a nature roll. [00:11:31] Speaker D: I will try. [00:11:33] Speaker B: Did this thing appear to be killed with a short sword? [00:11:36] Speaker A: It has been stabbed with a much larger than a sword sword blade. [00:11:39] Speaker D: Okay, maybe an axe. Maybe an axe or 16 was my history or my nature. [00:11:46] Speaker A: This is a powerful creature known as an ud. A sort of tentacled refuse beast. The three of you could probably take one. You don't think it would be a wise idea for you to try to take one? The mayor clearly took one. It's not clear what shape he's in though. [00:12:04] Speaker B: Is there human blood? Is the mayor human? Do we know that? Do we know whether the mayor is human? [00:12:08] Speaker A: The mayor was human. You did know that much? Give me investigate role would be appropriate. [00:12:14] Speaker B: Five. [00:12:16] Speaker A: There is too much guano for you to identify the difference between odiac blood and human blood. It's a terrible, rotted, gross mess down here. [00:12:26] Speaker D: Oh, we have to keep going. [00:12:29] Speaker C: We do. [00:12:30] Speaker B: Is there a sliding a torch, even. [00:12:32] Speaker D: With the thalmaturgy, Creedon is still like dry heaving. [00:12:35] Speaker B: Well, it's still squeaky. Squeaky as hell. Just to see. All know the. The pestilence monster in the last place kind of took the. Don't. [00:12:46] Speaker D: I don't want to think about that. [00:12:48] Speaker B: I just want to thank you, Nate, for the olfactory delight that this whole campaign has been so far. [00:12:56] Speaker A: I'm just here for you. [00:12:59] Speaker D: You're here to torture my poor, poor prissy character. [00:13:04] Speaker A: You walk a short distance. It's hard to tell distance down here because it's not quite a straight line. There's remnant cracked masonry everywhere. But you are now in a natural cave. [00:13:13] Speaker B: Is there any sign of the thorns down here? [00:13:16] Speaker A: None. You walk along this cave, which sort of does what caves do. It's not a straight line. So you're jerking from side to side and ducking under things and climbing over things. And you arrive at sort of an open t intersection. There is a left and there is a right. [00:13:32] Speaker B: Are there any smells or sounds coming from either direction? [00:13:36] Speaker A: Roll me perception. [00:13:37] Speaker C: Can I help? [00:13:38] Speaker D: I'd also like to roll that. [00:13:41] Speaker A: I think I'd like separate perception rolls. If you would like to roll 911. [00:13:47] Speaker B: Our dice are like quantum sync tonight. [00:13:50] Speaker D: Oh, yeah. [00:13:51] Speaker C: I rolled a nine, but I scored an eleven. [00:13:53] Speaker A: It is eerily quiet in both directions. [00:13:56] Speaker C: Which direction leads back towards the crater? [00:14:00] Speaker A: One of them leads directly into the thorns, and one of them leads a little bit away. And the one that leads a little bit away would probably take you near ish the crater. [00:14:11] Speaker B: Do you think the gold would be there? [00:14:13] Speaker C: Yes. That's where I would start. [00:14:15] Speaker D: So that's the left path or the right path? [00:14:17] Speaker A: Left. [00:14:18] Speaker B: Okay. We should go left first. [00:14:21] Speaker C: I prefer going left first anyway, just as a general, like what to do. [00:14:24] Speaker D: So great, everybody goes right. [00:14:27] Speaker A: All right, so you start walking. You are not too far down the path when you hear a disembodied voice. A voice and no body attached to it. This is remarkably close to you. Topsiders. Again, you don't look to be as in bad shape as the last one, so maybe we can negotiate. Why are you in my cave? [00:14:55] Speaker D: We're looking for probably the one that wasn't in good shape before us. [00:15:00] Speaker A: You are here to rescue your comrade. [00:15:04] Speaker B: We are here to potentially apprehend him. [00:15:10] Speaker A: He has already been apprehended by our authority. [00:15:14] Speaker B: Which authority would that be? [00:15:16] Speaker A: The authority of the fairy dwarves. [00:15:19] Speaker B: What do we know about the fairy dwarves? What would we roll? [00:15:22] Speaker A: Go ahead and roll. Nature. [00:15:26] Speaker B: Oh, my God. Four. Anybody else want to take a stab at that one? [00:15:31] Speaker D: I will try. [00:15:33] Speaker C: I don't. [00:15:34] Speaker D: Nine. [00:15:35] Speaker A: Okay. There are dwarves that are fairies. That's the best you're going to get. [00:15:40] Speaker D: What was his crime to your people? [00:15:42] Speaker A: Trespassing and killing our pet. [00:15:45] Speaker B: What was your pet? [00:15:46] Speaker A: I believe your people call it ed Udig. [00:15:49] Speaker B: Yes, we saw that. My condolences. It is very hard to lose a pet. Sometimes harder than losing a person. [00:15:56] Speaker A: That is an absurd sentiment. [00:16:01] Speaker C: I didn't think we would agree so quickly, but we agree. [00:16:06] Speaker A: He has been arrested. [00:16:08] Speaker B: What will happen to him? [00:16:09] Speaker A: Very likely slavery. [00:16:12] Speaker C: All right. How much is a slave worth to you? [00:16:18] Speaker A: How much. How much is a slave worth? 300 gold. [00:16:22] Speaker C: How much is a slave's head worth to you? [00:16:25] Speaker A: Nothing. [00:16:26] Speaker C: Excellent. So what if we just take the head? [00:16:32] Speaker A: Yes, well, I can't trade the head without trading the bot. Well, actually, maybe I could. Do you need the head to still be talking? [00:16:41] Speaker D: I would love that, yes. [00:16:45] Speaker B: Liz says it would be useful if we could get answers out of this. Yes. [00:16:50] Speaker E: Hmm. [00:16:52] Speaker A: I propose an alternative option. He will be a much more useful slave with his head talking or not. How about you just simply interrogate him while he's alive and then leave when you have the information with which you seek? [00:17:06] Speaker B: We can do that. [00:17:07] Speaker D: We will not be arrested for trespassing. [00:17:10] Speaker A: You are trespassing. Yes. But you did not kill my beloved pet. [00:17:16] Speaker D: That's true. [00:17:17] Speaker B: Losing pets is hard. [00:17:19] Speaker A: Nor have you yet offended me. [00:17:21] Speaker D: I am okay with that. [00:17:22] Speaker B: I want to ask him what this is going to cost us, but I don't want to ask him what this is going to cost us, because then he's going to come up with something for it to cost us. [00:17:32] Speaker A: I would simply ask for a piece of information. [00:17:35] Speaker B: If we have it available to us, we would give it to you. [00:17:40] Speaker A: Excellent. The question I would ask is, are you aligned with the fuzzy men from the other direction of this tunnel? [00:17:51] Speaker B: Fuzzy men? [00:17:52] Speaker D: I don't believe that direction. No, I don't believe that we are aware of. [00:17:56] Speaker C: As you know, we are copsiders and so completely ignorant of the denizens and inhabitants of these tunnels. [00:18:04] Speaker D: Good one. [00:18:05] Speaker A: Fuzzy or not, this information pleases me. Please come this way. [00:18:10] Speaker B: Thank you. [00:18:11] Speaker A: So, nothing appears, which makes it very hard to come this way. But you get the impression as you hear very soft footprints heading further down the tunnel you were heading down. [00:18:22] Speaker C: So just to put it out there. [00:18:24] Speaker B: I do have fairy fire. [00:18:26] Speaker C: Maybe I should stand guard here or up. And we'll see if our winged guests, winged friends, come back. [00:18:36] Speaker B: Do you think they would fly down their own shitter? [00:18:39] Speaker D: I'm thinking going back up out of game. [00:18:41] Speaker C: I'm trying to accuse myself from the situation. [00:18:44] Speaker B: I know. [00:18:46] Speaker D: If you need to go take a walk, buddy. I think that's a great idea. [00:18:50] Speaker B: You standing guard to make sure the harpy doesn't come back is an excellent idea. Also, keep a lookout for these fuzzy men. [00:18:57] Speaker C: Yeah. I'm asking the party's thoughts on me. Going with or not is what I'm trying to do. [00:19:02] Speaker B: Yeah. And Boulain is saying, I think it would be an excellent idea for you to stand guard against the harpy and these fuzzy men. [00:19:08] Speaker C: All right. [00:19:09] Speaker B: I would advise not picking a fight with the fuzzy men, if you can help. [00:19:13] Speaker C: No. I'll be in the tower in the shithole. [00:19:17] Speaker A: Okay. [00:19:18] Speaker B: You enjoy that. [00:19:20] Speaker A: Boulain and Creedon, you are brought into a room. [00:19:24] Speaker B: Boulain will send Sadie with Zuris so that we know. Help. [00:19:29] Speaker A: You are brought into a room. It has a tunnel. Leaving it. But this room is made of stone. It looks like it was originally some part of a larger complex. But, like, things have been. Walls have just been torn down, and you can come and go through the natural caves. Looks like it's been heavily excavated. Anything that was here is certainly long gone. But tied up in the corner is a feverish looking man. [00:19:53] Speaker D: Is he wearing armor still? [00:19:56] Speaker A: He is, yes. Lying on the floor next to him. Well, a ways away from him, actually. On the opposite side of the room is a giant glaive with the scales of a red dragon decorating the grip. [00:20:11] Speaker B: Mayor Val. [00:20:12] Speaker A: Yeah. He looks up and says, yes. [00:20:15] Speaker B: We were sent from Sternheim to try to find you. [00:20:19] Speaker A: I've been kidnapped. I've been kidnapped. I don't even know what they are. They're like, I can't see down here, and then they're not visible. I don't even know what were you. [00:20:30] Speaker D: Doing down here in the first place. [00:20:33] Speaker A: I was investigating this cave I found. [00:20:37] Speaker D: You didn't know about this cave ahead of time? [00:20:40] Speaker A: It's a cave that I found. He was just here. [00:20:44] Speaker D: I want to roll an inside dinky dinky story. [00:20:49] Speaker B: That's not great. I got a nap. 113. [00:20:54] Speaker A: You would not have climbed down a pooh hole for curiosity alone. [00:20:59] Speaker B: Sure. [00:21:00] Speaker D: Apparently Creedon thinks this is so plausible. [00:21:04] Speaker B: I mean, we climb down it, right? Yeah. [00:21:07] Speaker C: She climbs down pooh holes all the time just to satisfy her curiosity. Totally plausible. [00:21:14] Speaker D: Seems legit this one, Val. [00:21:17] Speaker B: There. I will not lie to you. There is quite a bit of suspicion surrounding you regarding some murders in Sternheim and also among the centaurs. [00:21:28] Speaker A: I killed no one. [00:21:31] Speaker B: We do not believe you. [00:21:34] Speaker A: Yeah, well, that's fine, I guess. Just get me out of here, and we'll deal with this in a court of law. [00:21:42] Speaker B: Well, our hands are a little tied on that, Val, because you have been arrested by fairy dwarves, and we made an agreement to interrogate you in exchange for some information. They intend to sell you into slavery. [00:21:56] Speaker A: Well, okay, don't let them do that. [00:21:59] Speaker D: You are giving us no reason to. [00:22:02] Speaker B: Not before we stick our necks out to help you. Do you want to rethink your version of your story? [00:22:09] Speaker A: I'm rolling. D see how he reacts. His eyes come unfocused and he starts to shiver. And he seems to stop talking to you. [00:22:21] Speaker B: Oh, yeah. [00:22:21] Speaker D: For the record, I think that Creedon would have a torch that she had taken off of Zerus to be able to see herself down here. So he can see us as well. [00:22:30] Speaker A: Creedon, go and roll me an investigation. Roll? Since you have a light source in our. [00:22:34] Speaker D: Yes. Here, I got another nat one. Oh, my God. [00:22:38] Speaker B: All right, Boulain will go and look at the glave. [00:22:43] Speaker A: Yeah, roll me a investigate. Roll. And tell me, describe looking at this glave to me. You're just going to stand there and stare at it? [00:22:51] Speaker B: I mean, it's on the ground. [00:22:53] Speaker A: It is. [00:22:53] Speaker B: Okay. She squats down to look at it. She knows the probability that this thing might be cursed. So she's not going to touch it, but she is going to look at it. That's a two. [00:23:08] Speaker A: Absolutely beautiful. [00:23:09] Speaker B: Okay. Trying to figure out whether I should cast cure wounds on him and waste a spell slot. Would that help him if I cast cure wounds? [00:23:16] Speaker A: Probably not. It looks like he's recovered from his injuries, except he has some sort of horrendous fever. Lesser restoration would be helpful. [00:23:26] Speaker B: I don't have that. Does Creighton have a scroll of lesser restoration? [00:23:30] Speaker D: Yeah, we had a scroll of greater restoration. Oh, I do actually have one scroll of lesser restoration. [00:23:35] Speaker A: You could cure his disease. [00:23:37] Speaker D: That's my last scroll. [00:23:38] Speaker B: If you feel like it is a worthwhile endeavor, we could lift his fever. But it is a valuable scroll. I leave that to you. [00:23:47] Speaker D: It is. But I think that if we want to end the conflict between the centaurs and the humans, we need to understand what happened. And the only way to do that is with the burst cooperation. At least I'm assuming as much. It seems like he's clearly involved. [00:24:02] Speaker B: I think we need him, and we need him talking in order to resolve this conflict. Because I believe he is responsible for it. [00:24:09] Speaker D: All right, I can try to use it. I am looking up the rules of this again. Let's see what's the restoration is level. [00:24:16] Speaker A: Lesser restoration, I believe, is level two. [00:24:18] Speaker B: Oh, yeah. [00:24:18] Speaker D: I actually need to give this one to you, I think, because I don't have lesser restoration on my spell. [00:24:26] Speaker A: Boulain, you can use this without having to roll and do that. [00:24:29] Speaker B: Okay. Boulain will cast. [00:24:30] Speaker D: I will pass it over. [00:24:31] Speaker B: Boulain will cast less restoration on. Val. Mayor Val. [00:24:37] Speaker A: He still has that fever sweat all over him, but he suddenly looks coherent and he says, what? [00:24:42] Speaker B: Welcome back. [00:24:42] Speaker A: Oh, my God. Where am I? [00:24:45] Speaker B: Do you remember the last five minutes talking to us, Mayor Val? [00:24:50] Speaker A: God. Vaguely. [00:24:51] Speaker B: You are in a cave of fairy dwarves underneath an old keep from Fenrir. Do you remember going into a. Ah, gotcha. [00:25:03] Speaker A: Yes, I do. [00:25:04] Speaker D: What is the last thing you remember? Do you remember the poop shoot? [00:25:10] Speaker A: Yeah. There was some sort of monster in the bottom of it. I kicked its ass. It kicked my ass. And apparently my wounds got infected. [00:25:18] Speaker D: That's not a shock. [00:25:20] Speaker A: Ran into these guys and they're dangerous. Don't fuck with them. [00:25:24] Speaker B: Yes, we are. [00:25:24] Speaker D: We're trying not to. [00:25:25] Speaker B: We are currently making deals with them. But in spite of our better judgment. Val, what were you looking for? [00:25:31] Speaker D: I'd like to remind you that at the moment, we are the only people that can possibly help you. [00:25:36] Speaker A: There is a rumor of the lost gold of Sternheim. A full wagonload of it. Thousands of gold. A full shipment of taxes from Turtle Bay headed into Astragar lost, supposedly in this area. [00:25:52] Speaker B: And you were looking for it? [00:25:54] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:25:54] Speaker D: How did you get access to this cave? I believe it was sealed. [00:25:58] Speaker A: It was. But the citizens came together, and some of them remembered the secret of how to open it. So we were able to find the keys and open it. [00:26:10] Speaker B: By we, are you referring to the blacksmith, poot carbuncle, and the apothecary autumn Vale. [00:26:16] Speaker A: They were a part of the original adventuring party that slew the dragon. [00:26:21] Speaker D: Then can you tell us why they ended up dead? [00:26:23] Speaker B: Murder items stolen from them and showing up on the statue outside of this cave that you entered. [00:26:31] Speaker A: They provided the items of their free will. Boulain, roll me. [00:26:37] Speaker D: Yeah, I want to insight this or something. [00:26:39] Speaker B: Insight? Is that what you said? [00:26:41] Speaker D: Oh, persuasion. [00:26:42] Speaker A: Insight would be you could roll insight. If you want to see if he's lying, I would need to know. Persuasion to see how he responds to you then. [00:26:48] Speaker B: All right. Insight is. [00:26:51] Speaker D: Oh, my God, I got a two. [00:26:53] Speaker B: Insight is 21. [00:26:55] Speaker A: Okay. [00:26:56] Speaker B: And then persuasion. [00:27:02] Speaker D: I am useless in this conversation. [00:27:04] Speaker B: Persuasion is an eight. First of all, is he lying? [00:27:09] Speaker A: You don't believe him? [00:27:10] Speaker B: Okay. [00:27:13] Speaker D: I'm going to pull boule into the side for a second so that I can clandestinely say something and just kind of mouth suggestion to Boulay. [00:27:25] Speaker B: That is not a bad idea. He is lying and he does not seem to be wanting to fess up. So I would say try it. All right. [00:27:35] Speaker D: I will go ahead and cast suggestion on him, and he will need to pass a DC 15 wisdom saving thrill. [00:27:46] Speaker A: He does. You say, I suggest, and whatever you say and he says, I've told you everything I know. [00:27:53] Speaker D: Well, that's a lie and we all know it. [00:27:56] Speaker B: Well, thou we can leave you here with everything you know, and you can know it throughout your life of slavery to the fairy dwarves. [00:28:04] Speaker A: Look, I'll tell you what. You seem like reasonable people. What would it cost me to have you just get me out of here and just let me go? [00:28:15] Speaker B: 600 gold. [00:28:18] Speaker D: Damn, that was quick. [00:28:19] Speaker A: All right. For 600 gold, I will agree to your terms. If you get me out of here, I can get you 600 gold. [00:28:27] Speaker B: Where will you get it from? [00:28:28] Speaker A: Well, I happen to know that there are roughly three entities in this room that are holding it. [00:28:36] Speaker B: Three entities in this room? [00:28:40] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:28:40] Speaker B: These would be the invisible fairy dwarves. [00:28:43] Speaker A: Yep. [00:28:44] Speaker D: I want to pull Bolena aside again and kind of whisper like. We need zeros. That's where this is going. [00:28:51] Speaker A: I don't believe they have all of it. I feel like they mentioned some fuzzy humans that probably have the other half. [00:28:57] Speaker D: That's a potential option. We could try to negotiate with them to help out with their fuzzy people problem. In exchange for the mayor's release and possibly some of what we find. [00:29:09] Speaker B: That's not a bad idea. Who are these fuzzy men? [00:29:12] Speaker A: Beats me. They've been causing trouble for these guys. At least they were before the fever took. [00:29:18] Speaker D: Sounds like a familiar story. Well, maybe not the fever part. What fever? [00:29:24] Speaker B: So the fairy Dwarves didn't give us any names? Right. Because they're fairies. [00:29:28] Speaker A: No. [00:29:28] Speaker B: Okay. She says to our host, the fairy dwarves. Are you in here? [00:29:34] Speaker A: Yes. [00:29:35] Speaker B: Are you trying to obtain the other half of this gold from the fuzzy people? [00:29:42] Speaker A: We like gold. I can imagine they have some. It's in our territory. We believe it is ours. They are guilty of trespassing and theft. [00:29:53] Speaker B: How many of them are there? [00:29:55] Speaker A: Three. [00:29:57] Speaker B: Do you know what they can do? [00:30:00] Speaker A: Yes. [00:30:01] Speaker B: What can they do? [00:30:03] Speaker A: That is information that we would charge for. Generally speaking. [00:30:08] Speaker B: I am working my way up to a proposal, but I would like to know what we are in for. [00:30:14] Speaker A: Make your proposal, and perhaps what you are in for can be a condition of that. [00:30:19] Speaker D: We would potentially be interested in helping resolve that issue for you in exchange for allowing us to take this man from your custody and return to the. [00:30:32] Speaker B: Surface alive and still talking. [00:30:35] Speaker D: But we would want information about what we would be going into. [00:30:38] Speaker A: You may take him in exchange. [00:30:43] Speaker D: And his weapons and armor. [00:30:44] Speaker A: You may take him and the equipment he carried down. In exchange, you will capture alive the three fuzzy men. [00:30:54] Speaker D: Oh, all three of them? [00:30:56] Speaker B: Must it be all three? [00:30:57] Speaker A: They are more valuable alive than dead. [00:31:00] Speaker B: Because you intend to sell them to slavery? [00:31:02] Speaker A: They are guilty of trespassing and theft everywhere. [00:31:06] Speaker D: Has it off the legal system. [00:31:07] Speaker B: Yeah, Bulay looks at Creedon. [00:31:10] Speaker D: The job we were hired to do is to help resolve the issue in the town. I think this is our best bet of doing it. We could try to summon Xeris and get his opinion. [00:31:21] Speaker B: I think we need to ask forgiveness of Xeris and then just go do the thing. [00:31:27] Speaker D: I think that we want him with us if we have to capture these things a lot. [00:31:30] Speaker B: Yes, I agree. I absolutely agree. [00:31:33] Speaker D: He's good at picking things up and carrying them for us. [00:31:40] Speaker A: Like combat. [00:31:41] Speaker B: Granted. Remember that we need to take these things alive. [00:31:44] Speaker D: We help in combat a lot. [00:31:46] Speaker B: We need to take these things alive. Zuris is not the best for that. [00:31:50] Speaker D: He's not, but I think if we tell him that that's the mission. [00:31:54] Speaker B: This is a condition of the mission. [00:31:56] Speaker D: Yeah, he might be down for it. [00:31:58] Speaker B: I mean, I can stabilize all of them if he doesn't cut their heads off first. [00:32:02] Speaker D: That's true. We can tell him that there's a super good weapon that he can get out of this. Look at that awesome glaze. [00:32:10] Speaker B: That's probably cursed, but we'll cross that bridge when we get that. [00:32:16] Speaker C: Makes it better. [00:32:17] Speaker B: All right, so Boulain turns her attention back to the invisible fairy dwarves and says, so, to be clear, we will attempt to obtain these three fuzzy people alive for you. You tell us what their capabilities are before we go. And if, upon our success, you turn over custody of Val to us, along. [00:32:41] Speaker A: With all of his accoutrements, you use the word attempt. I would like a success. I would like to pay for a success. [00:32:49] Speaker B: Yes. Your payment for our success will be releasing Val into our custody. [00:32:56] Speaker A: And the gold that the fuzzies have stolen from us remains ours. [00:33:01] Speaker B: Yes, all but 600 that Val will owe us for getting him out of here. From my understanding, there is a vast amount more than that. [00:33:11] Speaker A: That is a steep bargain. But if you capture all three of them alive, perhaps they would be worth the 600 that you take. Very well. I can agree to this and no more. [00:33:24] Speaker B: All right. We will need to collect our comrade. [00:33:27] Speaker A: You may operate on whatever timeline you wish. If we are in agreement, I will provide you with the details. [00:33:34] Speaker B: Please do. [00:33:36] Speaker A: These fuzzy humans, we have been watching them for some time. They have set mini traps designed to drop flour and other substances on us. They do not see in the dark. And so they have lit torches that run down that side of the hall. And they fire crossbows at us as soon as we are visible. [00:34:04] Speaker B: Where do they get the flower? [00:34:06] Speaker A: We have overheard their names. Ray Jordan and Lisa. [00:34:12] Speaker B: Fuck. Nate. [00:34:13] Speaker D: Wait, who is that? [00:34:15] Speaker B: Nate. Oh, my God. [00:34:18] Speaker D: What is going on? [00:34:23] Speaker B: This is from the last campaign. Oh, my God. You're tugging my heartstrings on this one. [00:34:30] Speaker D: I have no attachment to these people. [00:34:33] Speaker B: And neither does Boulain. So they are actually human? [00:34:38] Speaker A: In a manner of speaking. [00:34:40] Speaker B: How are they not human? [00:34:42] Speaker A: They were human. But there's enough fairy magic in their veins now. It's hard to call them human. They no longer look like you. [00:34:53] Speaker B: This is the result of the thorns. [00:34:57] Speaker A: Of course. [00:34:58] Speaker B: I see. They are changing into Fae. The humans in Fenrir are changing into Faye. Creatures. [00:35:04] Speaker A: I do not know about all of Fenrir. Just Ray Jordan and Lisa. [00:35:11] Speaker B: God fucking damn. [00:35:14] Speaker D: Well, we've already agreed. [00:35:16] Speaker B: We've already. We've already agreed. Yeah, we're bound. Well, I mean, at the worst, we fail and they just take Val away for slavery, so. Can't say I care about that either. All right, let's go find Ziris. [00:35:40] Speaker A: Kindly roll me a D 20 and let me know what the number is. [00:35:44] Speaker C: That's an eight. [00:35:45] Speaker A: Yeah, you walk back down the path, you get to that t intersection. You turn to head up the way, and there's a glint of something that catches your eye just. Gosh, maybe 5ft down that path to the right. [00:35:57] Speaker C: Okay. I mean, I don't care. [00:36:00] Speaker D: Go get it, boy. [00:36:02] Speaker A: Okay. [00:36:05] Speaker D: I see shiniest stuff every day. [00:36:08] Speaker C: Xeris is not the one to go chasing after shining bobbles. [00:36:12] Speaker A: All right, you head back to the bottom of this hole and wait a few minutes. You hear something kind of in the distance, say, hey, hello. [00:36:21] Speaker E: You're not a dwarf. [00:36:22] Speaker C: That's true. You are most observant. [00:36:26] Speaker A: Get over here. [00:36:29] Speaker C: What's wrong with here? [00:36:31] Speaker A: They could be listening. [00:36:32] Speaker C: Okay, come here. [00:36:35] Speaker A: Stepping out around the corner. Into your firelight is a rat faced person. Like, they've got some definitely rodent features, like whiskers, sort of elongated face. They look human, with the exception of the fact that they're kind of fuzzy and they have. One of their hands is mutated into this big mole like digging claw. You appear to be cursed badly. Yes. [00:37:06] Speaker C: Do you want me to put you out of your misery? [00:37:10] Speaker A: No. But you are not cursed. [00:37:16] Speaker C: I think that's true. [00:37:19] Speaker A: That is exceptional. Which means you are from outside. [00:37:26] Speaker C: Yes, I am from outside. [00:37:28] Speaker A: How do we get there from here? [00:37:31] Speaker C: Oh, insight. You climb up a ship, that one. [00:37:37] Speaker D: With this rope that we conveniently left here. [00:37:40] Speaker C: Exactly. There's just a castle up there with some bones, as far as I know. There's one tunnel that goes out. [00:37:48] Speaker A: Out of the thorns, even. [00:37:50] Speaker E: Yes, I believe so. [00:37:52] Speaker C: I can show you the way. [00:37:54] Speaker A: That would be wonderful. I have two associates. Let me get them very quickly. [00:37:59] Speaker C: Maybe we can remove your curse. [00:38:02] Speaker A: That would be wonderful. [00:38:03] Speaker C: Or put you down. [00:38:06] Speaker E: You're scaring me. [00:38:07] Speaker A: Now, hold on a second. You're going to show us the way out, right? Yes. Great. [00:38:13] Speaker C: Then we try to remove the curse. [00:38:15] Speaker D: The way out of life. [00:38:18] Speaker B: The way out of life. [00:38:23] Speaker A: So he scampers around the corner, and you hear some clicking noises and a whistle, and then fuzzy. People, they'll look like humans, but they've got way too much hair, like they've got a wolverine Hugh Jackman thing going on. And they all have weird animal traits. Like, one of them has weird slit, slanty eyes that are clearly beastial in nature. One of them has a nose that's. [00:38:49] Speaker E: Been kind of pulled up. [00:38:51] Speaker A: And again, very beastial in nature. They're carrying crossbows, and they have daggers and leather armor, and they're like, this guy says he can get us out of here. [00:39:00] Speaker C: Oh, my. You all really pissed off some witch. [00:39:04] Speaker A: Yeah. Actually, I think it was a fairy. Fairy queen. [00:39:08] Speaker C: Well, let me wait for my compatriots and then we'll head out. [00:39:17] Speaker A: It's me, arch sage Archibald Mason, and. [00:39:22] Speaker E: I've had my three glasses of wine, which means it's story time. There once was a little girl who got too close to the raging river. When the silent judge arrived, she took pity on the girl, as she is known to occasionally do for the young, for who in their youth hasn't cheated death at least once? The silent judge turned her back and went to leave. [00:39:47] Speaker A: The child was awed, however, for she. [00:39:49] Speaker E: Insisted there be no exceptions to the rules and demanded to be taken to the world. The dead, in the name of law. And order. No person had ever turned down the indifference of the silent judge. The family of the daughter was not happy. And before the child's soul could even be taken to the realm of the dead, they called for the priest of the radiant one. The family had much money and was known in the land. And so the priest came as quickly as he could with gems of life and prayers of true power. But in the moment the priest beseeched the radiant one to return breath to the child, the small guards of storms and water came to plead their case. Storms know each other, while no man nor God understands the true power of a storm before it has grown. These lesser gods begged the radiant one to deny the wishes of his faithful. [00:40:44] Speaker A: The family of the child. [00:40:46] Speaker E: Because if she is returned to life, people might lose their fear of the water. And learn to fear this child instead. For she would be a truly terrible storm. The radiant one's power is as undeniable as the sun itself. And the God couldn't accept a mortal as dangerous to him. And so he sought to disregard the words of the storm gods. The storm gods called the radiant one and declared that if he were to persist, that he takes responsibility for the actions of this child through the whole of their life. The radiant one simply laughed. And the child was given breath anew. But in this moment, the Radiant one and the girl were bound. In this time, these few hours on the face of this plane was the longest the silent judge has ever spent with a soul. And the two gained a kind of friendship. The silent judge would look in upon the girl from time to time and see her progress. For the goddess of death and transportation of souls, this experience was new. She had always seen a person's life at the end as they looked back upon themselves. But in these fleeting moments, she saw the struggles of mortal life. [00:42:04] Speaker A: As truly is. [00:42:07] Speaker E: When future is unknown and past incomplete, the present is dramatic in a way the silent judge would not normally see. And so, as the child grew to a woman, the silent judge, ever neutral, ever watching, gained for the first time love for a single mortal. As the child grew, she chose sister truth, goddess of law and civilization, to be her guarding light. And Sister Truth saw the pureness of intent in the heart of the young woman and chose her back. This surprised no one. And in this moment, for the first time and the last time in all of the eons and epochs of this world was there a mortal who saw the favor of more than one God? But when this particular young woman would call upon the gods, the son, the law and death came to her aid. Such a power set the other gods aflutter. And in a world of a thousand gods, they all gazed upon the growing storm that was Saint Astragaria contessa, known in the heavens ever after as the godslayer. That is all for now, my young apprentices. Find your peace. Listen now to a different storyteller. [00:43:44] Speaker C: Hi, I'm Robert, and I play Zerus. Friends to rat people. [00:43:49] Speaker B: For the moment. [00:43:50] Speaker A: Yeah, they took all those threats to murder them pretty well. [00:43:58] Speaker B: Did he threaten to murder them? [00:43:59] Speaker C: I don't remember how it happened, but I don't think I did. [00:44:02] Speaker B: They were like, hey, you know the way out? And you're like, yeah. And that was where we left it. You were going to show them the way out. [00:44:06] Speaker A: He was also like, you guys are really cursed. I mean, we could get that cured or put you down. [00:44:11] Speaker B: Oh, yes. [00:44:12] Speaker C: I did say that. But, yeah, I believed. I was like, oh, yeah, you guys are Kurt, man, that sucks. We got to help you. [00:44:19] Speaker B: Zirist showed a rare moment of compassion for the less fortunate. [00:44:26] Speaker C: They came at me the right way. [00:44:27] Speaker D: Just the way that he says it isn't the nicest. [00:44:33] Speaker A: They just went out, right. [00:44:35] Speaker C: So when we. [00:44:35] Speaker D: Well, hey, we need to capture them. [00:44:38] Speaker B: Zuris is quote unquote mercy. [00:44:42] Speaker A: They're humans who ran afoul of the fairies, and they would, like, out. It's fine. [00:44:46] Speaker B: They didn't do anything to the fairies. They were born with humans running afoul of the fairies. [00:44:53] Speaker A: Yeah, true. Our scene opens. We have a t intersection, and in the center t line there is Xeris and three mutated people. I describe them as rat people, but really, there's a rat person and a mole person and some sort of weird mammalian hybrid thing that's unidentifiable. And coming around the corner from one of those t intersections of which you know the other one, the one you're not going down, and no one is in is full of traps. But coming around the corner is now Boulain and Creedon. When you round the corner, you see three slinky looking, leather armored, dagger wielding, fuzzy men. Well, one of them appears to be a woman. Hello. [00:45:38] Speaker C: I found these poor souls. They came to me, and they're asking that we take them back and get them uncursed. [00:45:44] Speaker B: That is great. We should go above ground and talk. [00:45:49] Speaker C: How far is above ground? [00:45:51] Speaker A: You just have to climb back up the poop chute. [00:45:53] Speaker B: We're going to need to climb back up the poop chute? Yeah. [00:45:55] Speaker A: Oh, all right. Sure. [00:45:57] Speaker C: You guys go ahead. First. [00:45:58] Speaker A: You point upwards. Right. And these three badly mutated people see the sunlight and get very excited, like, really animated all of a sudden, and start scrambling up. They are professional spelunkers. You immediately see a skill level that you do not have as they scale this thing and disappear out the top of this chimney. [00:46:20] Speaker C: I follow immediately behind them. [00:46:22] Speaker D: I'm assuming that we would have left a rope from when we climbed down. [00:46:26] Speaker A: Yeah, sure. [00:46:27] Speaker B: The lane will climb up after Xeris. [00:46:29] Speaker A: You get out. It's much as you left it. Still no sign of the harpies. [00:46:33] Speaker E: They have not come back. [00:46:34] Speaker A: There's still a massive dragon skeleton in a courtyard of shattered masonry that ends in a little path that leads into an underground tunnel. You can see the thorns poking up around the edges of the masonry, but the bowl of shattered masonry is safe. And standing in the sunshine, looking bewildered, is these three very hairy people. Now, in good light, they have bistial features, so their faces are just a little more animalistic than normal. They've got way more hair than a normal human typically has. And one of them, of course, has digger claws of a mole. And one of them has an odly shaped nose. [00:47:20] Speaker B: So Boulain will go up to them and say, ray Jordan, Lisa. [00:47:26] Speaker A: They immediately turn to you. You see their heads tilt slightly, and they look at each other, and everybody takes a big step back from you. They don't go for knives yet, but the one in the front with the digger claws says, who are you? [00:47:43] Speaker B: My name is Boulain. I am a cleric of the silent judge from Astragar, the kingdom. [00:47:51] Speaker A: Okay, okay. Religious people. Great. How do you know our name? [00:47:55] Speaker B: I will get to that if you will be patient. I have been given to understand that you have flour to detect the invisible creatures that are lurking in the caves below. [00:48:05] Speaker A: Yeah, I mean, if you fill the room with flour, it sort of lands on them. And there's this space where there's no flour. That's definitely where they are. [00:48:14] Speaker B: Could I prevail upon you to put flour around the poop hole here so that we know if anyone comes up after us to listen? [00:48:25] Speaker A: Yeah. All right. He walks around. He has a bunch of belt pouches in a backpack with one of those cross straps across his chest. [00:48:33] Speaker E: And he pulls one of the belt. [00:48:35] Speaker A: Pouches out and pulls out a little baggie and then just slams it down at the top of this. And just a plume of flour goes everywhere and then slowly settles. He says, we're clear right now. [00:48:46] Speaker B: Okay, wonderful. Sadie, will you please watch the hole and let me know if you see footprints and she will perch her above that and then move the whole party, us and the fuzzy people as far away from the hole as we can get. And she says, all right, I have. [00:49:04] Speaker D: Creedon wants to elbow Boule real quick and say, do you not think that we should talk to Xeris alone first? [00:49:10] Speaker B: No, I think we will explain it all in one go. [00:49:14] Speaker D: Okay. [00:49:15] Speaker B: She says, I have some slight bad news, but also some good news, if you will hear me out. [00:49:22] Speaker A: So the three people who are looking more and more anxious at you continue to look very anxious at you. [00:49:30] Speaker B: So when we ventured into the tunnels below, unfortunately, we ran into your adversaries first, these fairy dwarves. And they have prisoner someone that we need because he owes quite an explanation to some people outside the thorns. So in negotiating his release, what they asked for was for us to turn the three of you over to them. And not knowing that you were from Fenrir or who you were, we agreed. And my impression is their intention is for you to become slaves. Now, I did not agree to hand you over tied up or disarmed. [00:50:14] Speaker A: I'm going to stop you because something does happen. Mainly speaking, I rolled them a wisdom saving throw to not freak the fuck out. [00:50:24] Speaker B: And they freak the fuck out. [00:50:26] Speaker A: They rolled a one, a two and a twelve. [00:50:28] Speaker D: Boy, oh, boy. [00:50:29] Speaker A: So two of them basically take a big step back. Hands go down to knives, and one's like, whoa, hold on, hold on, hold on. She didn't say she was selling this out. Stop. And they take several more steps back. And you may continue your conversation, but they are now quite on edge, ready to run from you or fight. [00:50:50] Speaker B: I have no intention for the three of you to become slaves to fairy dwarves. The fact that they are taking people and turning them into slaves is pretty condemning, in my view. And in my companion's view, I think. So my thinking is that we do a ruse where we hand you over, but you are fully armed. I will cast a spell that will hopefully make them visible to us. And we will be six on three if we can take them. There is quite a horde of gold they have, as I understand. And we could divvy that up among us. And then your problems with hostile fairy Creatures in your trevise will go away. [00:51:29] Speaker A: Roll me? Persuasion. [00:51:31] Speaker D: It's a hell of a persuasion. [00:51:34] Speaker A: Regular roll. [00:51:35] Speaker B: Regular roll. Because it's weird. [00:51:37] Speaker A: Well, I mean, there's definitely good things for them in this, but you're asking them to go back down in the. [00:51:45] Speaker B: Hole and face things. [00:51:47] Speaker A: They can smell freedom. [00:51:49] Speaker B: Okay, that's not bad. That's a 17. [00:51:53] Speaker A: Okay, so the one in the front who's still peering you out basically says, okay, I'm willing to trust you if there's gold in it on the other end, but I'm going to need some assurances that you're a trustworthy person because I met you just now and I don't know how to get out of the thorns from here, but I'm guessing that tunnel goes somewhere and I would like to be in it instead. So you got to give me some evidence that this is a good idea. Otherwise we are running for it. [00:52:28] Speaker B: Out of character. The fairy dwarves did say that they had half the horde and the fuzzy people had the other half. Right. [00:52:34] Speaker A: The fairy dwarves did not admit to their gold possession. But Mayor Val told you that they have at least 600 gold worth of gold and that these two groups were. [00:52:45] Speaker B: Fighting over it, trying to think what Luline's got of value on her. [00:52:50] Speaker D: Yeah, I'm looking through mine. [00:52:51] Speaker B: I have silver crossbow bolts. [00:52:54] Speaker A: They would want those, I will remind you. I mean, I guess you don't know this, but the economy in Fenrir is very different than the one you're in, right? [00:53:03] Speaker B: Yeah. Zulane says, well, I have twelve silvered crossbow bolts that I would be willing to turn over to you possibly to aid in this venture or to use afterwards. [00:53:15] Speaker A: They cook at each other and they're like, all right, you hand over the twelve crossbow bolts. If we still have them when we're done, we'll take a share of the gold. We'll split it up however you want. The ferries will be done, four and we'll be on our way. What do you think, guys? And the two have been looking very nervous. Start to calm down and they say, okay, all right. And they pull out hand crossbows from their bags. Boulain, I believe you're in a position to give me a perception roll. [00:53:46] Speaker B: Not good. Eight. Okay, that's with a plus five. Yep. [00:53:51] Speaker A: They have hand crossbows. [00:53:52] Speaker B: I was going to do an insight roll to see if they were in earnest. [00:53:55] Speaker A: Go ahead and roll insight. [00:53:56] Speaker D: Are we not also seeing them do this? [00:53:58] Speaker A: You are. Boulain was closest. I think I'll give you disadvantage, but the other two of you can roll perception as well. [00:54:06] Speaker D: In my mind's eye, we were just standing in a circle talking. [00:54:09] Speaker B: Yeah, I was figuring we were in a circle talking, but that's a 17 insight. [00:54:13] Speaker A: A 17 insight. They are being really guarded about these bags. It's really noticeable and they are fearful of these fairies and would like to kill them. [00:54:22] Speaker C: Okay, eleven on my perception I got ten. [00:54:25] Speaker A: Okay. [00:54:26] Speaker D: I rolled a nat 20 with one of the dies. [00:54:28] Speaker B: Well, they're being very guarded about the bags that are on them. [00:54:33] Speaker A: Yes. [00:54:33] Speaker B: Okay. All right. [00:54:35] Speaker A: So they opened them in such a way that you couldn't really see what was inside of them. And they pulled out their hand crossbows and then they wrapped them back up immediately and shoved them back on their back. Your insight tells you there is something important in those bags that they do not want you to see. [00:54:50] Speaker B: I'm going to guess it's the gold they found that the fairy dwarves are. [00:54:53] Speaker E: Seems like a reasonable assumption. [00:54:55] Speaker B: Okay. And Boulain says, also, if you do not mind, if we are successful with this and have an afterwards, I would very much like to know what is going on in Fenrir. [00:55:05] Speaker A: They look at you and they're going to roll one of them a dice. [00:55:10] Speaker B: So. [00:55:11] Speaker A: One of them? Yeah, we could totally tell you all the things in Fenrir. We're really important people over there. We know basically everything that's going on. So we'll fill you in. [00:55:22] Speaker B: Wonderful. She looks at Xeros and Creed and says, does this sound like a viable plan? [00:55:26] Speaker D: What is your plan to make them visible? [00:55:30] Speaker B: I was going to cast fairy fire on them. [00:55:33] Speaker D: Okay. [00:55:34] Speaker C: I'm not a magic user, but I'm going to just ask. Don't normally spells require the ability to see the thing you're casting the spell on? [00:55:44] Speaker B: Well, the nature of fairy fire is it makes the unseen seeable. [00:55:49] Speaker D: It's specifically for basically this situation. [00:55:53] Speaker B: It's for this exact thing. [00:55:56] Speaker A: He's an aoe for that reason. [00:55:58] Speaker D: All right, we should bring some flour too, just in case we could get separated or something. [00:56:03] Speaker B: If you have more flour, that could also potentially come in handy. There is a possibility they can avoid the spell. [00:56:09] Speaker A: I mean, we have a couple bundles each. They'll each hand you one cheesecloth of flour, one flower. [00:56:17] Speaker B: Bob. All right, well, we do need to go under the ruse that I am handing you over. So you should probably not quite be holding the crossbows when we march in there. Yeah, I have no intention of disarming you at all. In fact, I am arming you with extra silver bolts to help you. [00:56:36] Speaker A: We can do something about that. And you watch. Oh, shit. You watch them try to conceal weapons on their persons. It goes. [00:56:45] Speaker E: Okay. [00:56:51] Speaker D: I don't think it's the most convincing. [00:56:54] Speaker B: Well, once again, I did not agree to disarm them, tie them up, and I did not agree to our behavior once we handed them over. So once I say they are in your captivity, I think we are free and clear to do whatever we need to do. [00:57:06] Speaker D: Do we have a signal or anything? [00:57:08] Speaker B: Does urus need a signal? [00:57:12] Speaker D: Well, I mean, you and I are going. We're. Is all hell breaking loose as soon as we hand them over? [00:57:18] Speaker B: Probably. [00:57:19] Speaker C: Okay, I'm just a little confused. Why are you so worried about the wording of the deal you're about to break? [00:57:25] Speaker B: Zuris, when it comes to fairies, and Boulain is going to lean on her past experience of having been in fenrir and understanding a little bit how it works. She says the word of the law is what matters. All right, so when you fulfill or you break a deal, you have to stick to the word of the agreement that you made. [00:57:45] Speaker C: All right. [00:57:46] Speaker B: And they agreed if we were successful in handing over the prisoners to them, that they would surrender mayor Val to us alive and in good condition. [00:57:57] Speaker C: Great. All right, let's do it. [00:57:59] Speaker B: I will say that if we are not successful in this and they just kill Val, I will not really regret his loss. He does not seem like a great. [00:58:09] Speaker C: Yes. [00:58:09] Speaker D: Do we think without him, we'll be able to put to rest the conflict between the centaurs and the Town? [00:58:14] Speaker B: Now, that is what we are hoping to do, but we might be able to do it without him. I mean, if he was causing the problem in the first place. If he is gone, then he will not be causing a problem going forward. All right. Shall we do this? [00:58:29] Speaker A: Sure. [00:58:29] Speaker C: I'm for it. [00:58:30] Speaker A: You head back down with some trepidation. The three people that are with you also head back down. You walk down the path you know is free of traps and into the room again. I'm assuming you have a light source. [00:58:42] Speaker B: Yes. [00:58:43] Speaker E: Okay. [00:58:45] Speaker D: I think Creedon would be carrying a torch because she can't see you. [00:58:49] Speaker A: Walk into the room. There is a mostly cleared piece of masonry rubble leading into a natural cavern. Past it, on one side of the. [00:58:58] Speaker E: Room, there's a set of chains and. [00:59:01] Speaker A: Ropes, and inside some of those chains is Val Richtus, the paladin captain and mayor of Sternheim. Away from him, out of arm's reach, is a beautiful glaive made of metal with this red glint and red dragon scales as the handle material. There is no sign of anyone else in this room, but you probably know better. [00:59:29] Speaker B: Master's fairy doors. [00:59:31] Speaker A: Yes. [00:59:33] Speaker B: We have brought you your fuzzy people. [00:59:35] Speaker A: As requested, and you will be turning them over to us. [00:59:41] Speaker B: I turn them over to you. [00:59:42] Speaker A: Very well. They are received. You may take Val. [00:59:48] Speaker B: Will you unchain him, please? [00:59:50] Speaker A: A key jingles to the floor by your feet. [00:59:53] Speaker D: Creedon will pick it up. You've been doing the talking. I am playing bad cop, I guess. I'm standing in the back looking very intimidating. The best that I can, I pick up the key and I suppose walk over to. So is he in a cage or is there just like a. [01:00:11] Speaker A: No, he's wrapped in a chain, holding his arms down to his side, around his might just. [01:00:18] Speaker D: I'm going to look at Boulain and raise my eyebrows. I'm not sure if we should actually release him right now or just maybe stand him up and. Is this, like, torso bound? Can he walk if I pick him up? [01:00:30] Speaker A: He probably could walk. He's got a whole massive length of chain, so it wouldn't go well, but he could walk. [01:00:37] Speaker B: We do not want him to touch the glave. [01:00:39] Speaker D: Yeah. So should I unlock him? [01:00:42] Speaker B: Unlock him so he can walk. Okay, but do not release his arms. [01:00:46] Speaker D: Yeah, I want to keep him bound, but make it so that he has free movement. [01:00:52] Speaker B: I suppose he's more or less our prisoner now. [01:00:55] Speaker D: Yeah. [01:00:56] Speaker A: Okay. You pull the lock off, remove some of the extra chains, relock just a smaller portion of the chains around him. And Val doesn't say a word. He stands up and doesn't say anything. Looks directly at you, Grayden. [01:01:07] Speaker B: All right. [01:01:08] Speaker D: I kind of want to walk him back towards. Basically to the back of the room towards the entrance that we came to. [01:01:14] Speaker E: Okay. [01:01:14] Speaker B: And then go time. Boulane will cast fairy fire on the room. [01:01:28] Speaker A: And that is a wrap. Don't forget to leave us a rating and review. Special. Thanks, Todd Ferguson of my pet machine for our tunes, Julie at elaborate flight of fancy for our logo, and John Tara, the original author of the town of Sternheim back in the 90s. What have our characters gotten themselves into? I guess you'll find out soon. Next time on carrots and suffering.