Episode Transcript
[00:00:30] Speaker A: Hello, hello, and welcome to carrots and suffering a dnd odyssey. Don't forget to leave us a rating and review.
Last time on carrots and suffering.
Our heroes finally laid to rest the soul of the lost green man priest whose demise set off the divine wrath that was the endurance ghost ship quest.
[00:00:50] Speaker B: Philip looks at the medallion, and she looks back up at Reha and she says, I am curious. When you presumed him dead, lost a sea, did no one put his soul to rest?
[00:00:59] Speaker C: Then the green man does not watch over you.
[00:01:04] Speaker A: Zerus got a dream call from the arch sage, and he reported out his findings in Turtle Bay.
[00:01:08] Speaker D: A Trafford beach crown is a dragon. They were trying to resurrect the turtle of Turtle Bay fame. Oh, we have, we think, successfully thwarted all plants to do that in any fashion. No sign of any vestige yet, though.
[00:01:28] Speaker A: Creedon learned more about the nature of her patron and was tasked with her last mission, to find a new patron.
[00:01:35] Speaker C: She is claiming that humans can create gods. Not that gods exist first, but that humans making that argument right now.
[00:01:45] Speaker E: Okay.
[00:01:46] Speaker B: Or she recruited credence so that credence would stop going down that path.
Okay. Interesting.
[00:01:53] Speaker A: Boulain got a visit from a vestige who had been hunting her and was challenged to think deeper about her relationship to the goddess. But it did give her a replacement bird for Sadie.
[00:02:04] Speaker B: Given that you are, for all intents and purposes, a vestige who challenges the raven queen, you have every reason to try to persuade me to betray her.
So, I mean, yes, I have given my life to her. I serve her. Why would I not do everything she wants?
[00:02:29] Speaker A: Okay, let's get into it.
[00:02:40] Speaker C: Hi, I'm Nate, and I will be your dungeon master.
[00:02:44] Speaker B: Hi, I'm Mandy. I play boulain, the grave domain death cleric.
[00:02:47] Speaker E: Hi, I'm Claire, and I play Creedon, the warlock of love, who has defeated another foe.
[00:02:53] Speaker D: Hi, I'm Robert. I play Zerus the barbarian, ready to kill some dragons.
[00:03:01] Speaker C: All right, when you come to from your ritual, it completes and you have a bird. We will give it a personality later. It does not talk. Just like your last bird.
[00:03:09] Speaker B: Does it give me any impressions?
[00:03:11] Speaker C: You get empathetic impressions from it. The ones you're getting right now are confusion and acceptance.
[00:03:17] Speaker B: She looks around a little self consciously and says, hi.
[00:03:20] Speaker C: You get sense of sort of loyalty. And the bird does a little bow.
[00:03:25] Speaker B: Male? Female? Both? Neither.
[00:03:27] Speaker C: You think it's a male?
[00:03:28] Speaker B: Names are important, so I will think about your name, but for now, it'll be bird.
[00:03:33] Speaker C: The bird bobs its head.
[00:03:35] Speaker E: I love that you talk to this thing and it's just like, oh, God, I get. Your pet just died. Do you just want another?
That just takes the sad away.
[00:03:44] Speaker B: This is my rebound. Familiar?
[00:03:48] Speaker C: In the morning when everybody has woken up, dread is making pancakes.
[00:03:52] Speaker E: Yay. Yeah, that's my man.
[00:03:55] Speaker C: Per the usual, they're perfection. Except for the first one, which is always ruined because that's how pancakes work. He eats that one himself. But Chom and Max are sitting at the table each eating a giant stack of pancakes and they're like, all right, I don't think we can wait any longer, guys. We got to deal with this dragon thing.
[00:04:14] Speaker B: We do need to deal with the dragon, says Boulain, with a new bird on her shoulder.
[00:04:18] Speaker E: Wait, did you like, resurrect Sadie or something? And she came back as a different bird.
[00:04:23] Speaker B: This is not Sadie. I have not named him yet. For now he is bird.
[00:04:27] Speaker E: Nice to meet you, sir.
[00:04:30] Speaker C: It gives you this strange birdie bow, Creighton does.
[00:04:34] Speaker E: It's cute squeak.
[00:04:35] Speaker B: He is very cordial. He seems a bit less crotchety than Sadie.
[00:04:39] Speaker E: A gentleman bird.
[00:04:41] Speaker B: Well, I had one thought about the dragon. Since Zuris found out about its water antics. One of the things we found on Mary soft touch's body was a map of the lower lock. I could copy that.
[00:04:56] Speaker D: May as well.
[00:04:57] Speaker E: Also, before we leave town, there's no reason not Green's interested in sourcing some potions of water breathing for us.
[00:05:03] Speaker D: More importantly for me or other martially adept individuals, we're going to need some kind of swimming or free action.
[00:05:12] Speaker E: This is probably the place to get those things, though. So before we leave Turtle Bay, we should definitely hunt all of start getting some good equipment.
[00:05:20] Speaker B: I do know where to go to get certain less than licit potions.
[00:05:26] Speaker E: Creighton can begin her plan to have the dragon and the allfather fall in love and start a new world. That's what my dream was about.
[00:05:35] Speaker B: The ship we will need to hit up for potions is the orphard, which is unfortunately one of Zeustilde's ships.
[00:05:43] Speaker E: Oh, question for Nate. Before Creighton joined for dinner, can she try to attune to this dagger that she took off of Miri and see what it does?
[00:05:53] Speaker C: You took it off of Dora?
[00:05:54] Speaker E: Sorry, mixing up crossing wires. Yes.
[00:05:57] Speaker C: Dora, this is the dagger of blind sight. Well, you have it. You can see everything within 30ft of you, period.
[00:06:07] Speaker E: Like it's a true sight thing.
[00:06:08] Speaker C: It's blind sight. So think of it more like echolocation.
[00:06:13] Speaker E: And is this like a one a day thing or like an all the time thing.
[00:06:16] Speaker C: All time.
[00:06:18] Speaker E: Nice. It's going to come in handy in a water battle. This one is remaining as a separate item. Right? Like, not like, infusing into my focus.
[00:06:26] Speaker C: You did not get any instructions for how to fuse them last time I.
[00:06:29] Speaker E: Threw it into a river. But I don't want to do that this time without being told to.
[00:06:34] Speaker C: So what kind of potions do you want to buy? And I'll tell you how outrageously expensive they are.
[00:06:38] Speaker E: Water breathing. How much is one? We got given some before, so I feel like they can't be that crazy.
[00:06:43] Speaker D: No, we got them from the admiral, actually.
[00:06:45] Speaker C: The harbor master cast them on you.
[00:06:48] Speaker B: No. That's right.
[00:06:48] Speaker C: It was a spell and not a potion.
[00:06:50] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:06:50] Speaker E: How much would it be to hire him to come with us? This might be cheaper.
[00:06:55] Speaker D: We need higher links. Yeah.
[00:06:57] Speaker C: When you go to Zestildy, they gouge you.
[00:07:01] Speaker B: Of course they do.
[00:07:02] Speaker E: Rude.
[00:07:03] Speaker C: They don't seem to be gouging other people, but they are gouging.
[00:07:06] Speaker B: They are gouging the fuck out of us. Serves us right.
[00:07:09] Speaker C: A water breathing potion is 375.
[00:07:12] Speaker E: Oh, my God. Highway robbery. The real criminals is used. Is still the well. Creedon does not buy that and is very incensed. How much is it to hire the harbor master to come with?
[00:07:27] Speaker B: We have a new job for you. It's very dangerous. You'll probably die.
[00:07:31] Speaker E: Yeah, but like a hundred. Gold is a lot of money for a harbor master. Probably.
[00:07:35] Speaker C: So something you do want to remember is the harbor master here is a church official. In fact, he's the highest ranking official of divine hammer in Turtle Bay. So you're trying to hire the lieutenant governor?
[00:07:50] Speaker E: How much does he charge to write some scrolls?
[00:07:53] Speaker A: Spell scrolls of water.
[00:07:55] Speaker F: Huh.
[00:07:55] Speaker E: Could anybody use that, though?
[00:07:58] Speaker C: Yeah, the harbor master could do you a scroll, but none of you could cast it. I don't believe. Unless it is on a spell list. That I can't see.
[00:08:04] Speaker E: Not on mine. Well, we do have our emergency backup green man thing.
[00:08:09] Speaker B: So one time use to not die as a result of nature.
[00:08:13] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:08:13] Speaker C: You can replicate an appropriate spell that might come up. Not die as a result of nature.
[00:08:19] Speaker B: That might come up very soon.
[00:08:20] Speaker C: Yes, like breathing underwater or walking on top of it. Also a choice thing I'm worried about.
[00:08:26] Speaker E: Is that our companions do not have it.
[00:08:28] Speaker B: They didn't undo a green man curse.
[00:08:32] Speaker C: You may have to split up.
[00:08:34] Speaker B: What?
[00:08:36] Speaker E: We're all one party now and we know better than to split the party.
[00:08:39] Speaker D: I'm concerned much more about fighting in water than living in water.
Some Internet person says alter self. Can give you a swim speed. That seems weird.
[00:08:53] Speaker C: It kind of makes sense.
[00:08:54] Speaker D: Aquatic adaptation. It's right there. Yeah, you sprout gills, you can breathe underwater and gain a swim speed.
[00:09:00] Speaker E: Oh, I think that's on my spell list.
[00:09:02] Speaker D: Sorcerer, wizard artificer. It is not a warlock spell.
[00:09:06] Speaker E: Well, that's also not helpful.
[00:09:08] Speaker D: But that is what I need.
How much for something that can get me that?
[00:09:14] Speaker C: So, again, struggling with houses stillty. Here they are gouging the shit out of you. 375.
[00:09:22] Speaker D: Okay, cool. I look at him. I assume this is just some random.
[00:09:28] Speaker C: Seller of potions at a house of steelty branded business.
[00:09:31] Speaker E: He can't handle his finest potions.
[00:09:34] Speaker D: I hope you understand that I'm a church official purchasing this for church business.
And you need, for your safety, to give me the best price possible on this.
[00:09:46] Speaker C: Go ahead and roll me. Persuasion or intimidate, you get to decide.
[00:09:50] Speaker F: Which one this is.
[00:09:51] Speaker D: That's intimidation. That's also off the table. Rolled an eight.
[00:09:55] Speaker C: So that's probably a twelve, he says. I'm sorry, sir. I'm under strict orders to offer the prices as listed for you.
[00:10:05] Speaker B: They're not even trying to hide it.
[00:10:06] Speaker E: We just should go to the black market. I'm over this.
[00:10:09] Speaker B: This is the black.
[00:10:10] Speaker E: This is the black market.
[00:10:11] Speaker B: Oh, fuck.
[00:10:12] Speaker D: No, this is not. No, this is still.
[00:10:14] Speaker C: This potion is not on a black market. Although you suspect you could find black market potions, like love potions, et cetera.
[00:10:21] Speaker F: If you went looking.
[00:10:23] Speaker B: The problem is Zeustildi is the one running the illicit potions. Gosh, in a terrible coincidence.
[00:10:31] Speaker C: Well, I don't know how coincidental it is. You pissed him off on purpose.
[00:10:36] Speaker B: No, but that he's the one running the potions.
[00:10:39] Speaker C: Well, okay, that is an unfortunate coincidence.
[00:10:43] Speaker B: That we now need potions after we arranged for his son to blow up his warehouses for him.
[00:10:49] Speaker C: I don't know if he knows you did that, but you definitely did interfere in his resurrected dragon turtle.
[00:10:55] Speaker B: Yes, we did. And we're not. Sorry.
[00:10:57] Speaker E: Did we figure out what type of damage this dragon does?
[00:11:01] Speaker D: Should be acid.
[00:11:02] Speaker E: Okay, I'm trying not to met a game here.
[00:11:05] Speaker D: We do know that it's a black dragon.
[00:11:07] Speaker E: And we know the deal with black dragons.
[00:11:09] Speaker B: We might be real ugly by the time this encounter is done.
[00:11:14] Speaker E: Beautiful. It's a good thing I could disguise myself forever.
[00:11:20] Speaker B: Boule's veil might be a permanent.
[00:11:22] Speaker D: All right, so two thoughts. One, it's probably going to be better to fight the dragon underwater.
[00:11:27] Speaker B: You think?
[00:11:28] Speaker E: I'd love to do that. If we could breathe. Get a way to breathe?
[00:11:32] Speaker D: Yeah. No. If we can live, hopefully the aquatic environment will limit its breath weapon.
[00:11:39] Speaker B: But you read that this particular dragon has water antics that it uses to its advantage.
[00:11:46] Speaker D: Do you think because it suspects that its prey is not going to be ready to fight in the water? I feel like fighting underwater is going to be better than taking an acid bath.
[00:11:57] Speaker B: I have an abstract thought.
[00:11:59] Speaker D: I also do, but you go with yours.
[00:12:02] Speaker B: Since we know that this dragon and the Allfather are rivals and enemies, I wonder if it is only a matter of showing the Allfather where the dragon lives.
[00:12:11] Speaker E: I was thinking something along the same lines. If we can leverage the allfather to aid us somehow.
[00:12:18] Speaker D: Great. Should we just get another love potion and make it fall in love with you?
[00:12:22] Speaker B: And then it'll change with another boat and then just lead the boat.
Try to stay ahead of it.
[00:12:30] Speaker E: Creedon does not like the idea of using love potions. But she has not loved the idea of a lot of things that we've done. How much is an illicit love potion? 300 gold.
[00:12:40] Speaker C: Here's the question. Are you approaching them as Creedon to buy a love potion?
[00:12:45] Speaker E: You can look like whoever you want. I can.
[00:12:47] Speaker B: You should go to Zeusildi's ship, disguise as somebody else and get the water breathing potions.
[00:12:53] Speaker D: I need one of those altar self potions.
[00:12:55] Speaker E: Can I disguise myself as. I want to disguise myself as the bar keeper of that 1 bar that we went to. Oh gosh. Slime leg stink leg or something.
[00:13:07] Speaker C: You want to disguise yourself as slime leg?
[00:13:09] Speaker F: Yeah.
[00:13:09] Speaker C: Okay.
[00:13:10] Speaker E: And go try to buy a love potion and some water breathing potion.
[00:13:15] Speaker C: Slime leg does work for somebody. Let me see how his reputation is.
[00:13:20] Speaker B: It's got to be good.
[00:13:22] Speaker C: Slime legs are personable as slime leg. The price of these potions tends to drop to about 250 gold.
[00:13:29] Speaker E: Still more than I could afford.
[00:13:30] Speaker C: You suspect this is a pretty normal deal?
[00:13:33] Speaker F: Not a particularly good one.
[00:13:35] Speaker E: Yeah. Okay. Slime leg complains that the bars don't pay what they used to and sadly drudges.
[00:13:42] Speaker D: Hey, Creedon. I mean, if this is the game, why not just turn into Zestildi or his child?
[00:13:48] Speaker E: I felt like that was. I would not turn into his child.
[00:13:51] Speaker B: I don't want to be killed or abducted for ramp.
[00:13:55] Speaker D: I'm assuming he has other children or his wife. Not him, specifically.
[00:14:00] Speaker C: Children. You don't have to be dicky to devious.
[00:14:03] Speaker E: I feel like though that it would be wild for just walk up and be like, I want to buy some potions.
[00:14:11] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:14:12] Speaker D: No, you don't. Say bye?
[00:14:13] Speaker E: Yeah, I want you to give me.
[00:14:14] Speaker D: You don't say bye.
[00:14:16] Speaker E: Do yourself up.
[00:14:17] Speaker B: Like a steward from house Cecili sent on an errand.
[00:14:22] Speaker E: That's not bad.
[00:14:22] Speaker B: That's not bad.
[00:14:23] Speaker E: Yeah, I'm not totally trying.
[00:14:25] Speaker D: Don't try to purchase them.
[00:14:27] Speaker B: Don't try to purchase them because they work for Zeusildy. So, like, you were there for Zeusildy's potions.
[00:14:32] Speaker E: Potions. I was like, I'm getting so much business today.
[00:14:37] Speaker B: Everybody's coming and asking for the same thing.
[00:14:41] Speaker E: I'm doing it.
[00:14:42] Speaker D: We definitely want alter self, if we can get them.
[00:14:45] Speaker C: If you could get six potions of altar self, the whole party could turn into fishmen.
[00:14:51] Speaker E: If we can do that, I will give up my dreams of all father interference. So I'm just going to go ask for or demand six potions of alter self. You're picking up for another one of the master's weird parties?
Yeah.
[00:15:11] Speaker D: Exactly what I was thinking.
[00:15:15] Speaker B: And have this put upon look on your face like, I don't know why they get.
[00:15:18] Speaker E: This is it. This is the play.
[00:15:22] Speaker C: Okay, hold on a second. I got to roll a d 20 to see if this guy knows about the weird parties.
Oh, my God, he does.
[00:15:30] Speaker E: Part of the month again. The full moon rises.
It's time for another one of the weird parties. You know what? I need only six this time. Six potions of alter self.
[00:15:46] Speaker C: Six?
Well, I mean, last time it was only four. Goes under the desk and pulls out six of them. Deception.
[00:15:57] Speaker E: It makes no difference to me.
[00:16:06] Speaker C: He pulls out six and he kind of leans over the table and says, I hear these are pretty impressive. Is it true the Lord's really into that kind of thing?
[00:16:18] Speaker E: I cannot disclose that information, but what.
[00:16:26] Speaker B: You'Ve heard is probably not too far off. Wow.
[00:16:30] Speaker C: And he sort of gingerly slides you a box of six altar self potions.
[00:16:35] Speaker E: And take them looking extremely tired.
[00:16:39] Speaker C: I don't know if this is. Well, good luck.
Flashes you a super awkward thumbs up.
[00:16:47] Speaker E: At least I'm not part of the cleanup crew.
I walk away.
Well, that was a way to get it done. All right.
[00:16:58] Speaker D: We're the worst.
[00:17:02] Speaker B: Remember that time we spent an entire gaming session just trying to score some fucking potions.
[00:17:09] Speaker E: And ended up getting them with party deception?
[00:17:13] Speaker D: So the other terrible thought I had was like, is limestone pretty resistant to acid? Basically. Where do we get fantasy tums of a sufficient size?
[00:17:26] Speaker C: Is limestone resistant to acid? Both marble and limestone are made sort of calcium carbonate, a base that can neutralize acid.
[00:17:32] Speaker B: Oh, my gosh.
[00:17:33] Speaker C: But in the process, the calcium carbonate is converted to calcium sulfate or calcium nitrate, which is then washed away.
[00:17:40] Speaker E: It's like a bath.
[00:17:41] Speaker C: You could get some chunks of limestone.
[00:17:44] Speaker D: Yeah, that was pretty much my thought, was limestone lozenge.
[00:17:51] Speaker E: We're going to fight a dragon. I was trying to think of, like, traps or things that we could use to disable stuff. That's not a bad idea.
[00:17:57] Speaker D: Since it's cheap. I'll get some limestone on a large stick. I can't imagine a limestone mallet is expensive. It's heavy, but I can handle heavy.
[00:18:08] Speaker C: You get a limestone mallet just in case, for some reason, it's being sold.
[00:18:13] Speaker B: If you can imagine it, it exists in Turtle Bay.
[00:18:16] Speaker E: What wacky plan do you have, Boule?
[00:18:18] Speaker B: My only plan was to copy the lock tattoo on Mary's body so that we'd have navigation through the lock and possibly a way to fuck with the water levels if we needed it.
[00:18:29] Speaker C: The lock, tatoo actually tells you an interesting thing about the lock's design. So it is essentially two doors that are shunted at an angle to closed and open. You know, where the levers are, you know how strong the gears and chains are.
[00:18:46] Speaker B: Pulain says, I have a terrible idea, as she copies this tattoo on some rice paper. What if we lure it in there and we just close the doors on it?
[00:18:54] Speaker D: Well, I don't know that the dragon is going to be lured into that, but that might work for the allfather.
[00:19:00] Speaker B: We don't want to hurt the allfather, do we?
[00:19:03] Speaker E: I'm hoping that we only have to deal with one of them at a time.
[00:19:06] Speaker D: I agree. One at a time.
[00:19:07] Speaker E: I mean, if we are able to get the dragon to go into there, I mean, it's definitely something to consider.
[00:19:12] Speaker B: If we could trap it there, then we would be shooting a fish in a barrel.
[00:19:15] Speaker D: True, but we're not trapping it.
[00:19:17] Speaker B: Why not? Why not try to lure it there and trap it?
[00:19:20] Speaker D: No, I was saying we're not trapping a dragon in there.
[00:19:22] Speaker B: Why not?
[00:19:23] Speaker D: Because dragons can fly.
[00:19:24] Speaker E: Well, this one swims, though, but he.
[00:19:26] Speaker B: Likes to go underwater.
[00:19:27] Speaker D: But if you put it in the trap, it will fly.
[00:19:32] Speaker B: No, the doors are going to pinch on it. It's not going to be able to.
[00:19:34] Speaker E: Move, like, around its neck. Sure, yeah.
[00:19:37] Speaker B: No, we're talking about, like, a pincher effect, like slamming the doors closed on the body.
[00:19:42] Speaker D: I was imagining the pinch and killing it.
[00:19:44] Speaker E: No, just trapping.
[00:19:47] Speaker B: I mean, if it killed it, that would make.
[00:19:50] Speaker E: Between your hands.
It's not going anywhere.
[00:19:53] Speaker D: I'm worried we have to go to the home of the dragon. What's the idea? To pull it out of hiding?
[00:19:59] Speaker B: I had not gotten that far. I just had the idea that there is this potential trap there. If we find a way to get it out of its layer.
[00:20:07] Speaker E: We know that the navy is a messing. We should learn how many boats we're going to have for this.
[00:20:14] Speaker D: It's a swamp, so I'm imagining not many. It may not be navigable by boats. How wet is the swamp? Is it everglade swamp or is it marshland swamp?
[00:20:24] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:20:24] Speaker D: Okay.
[00:20:25] Speaker C: Swamp gets marshy in places you suspect. Like over where the dragon is actually living.
[00:20:32] Speaker B: So if he is hunting the hallfather in the river, we might stand a chance of getting him near the lock.
[00:20:39] Speaker D: Yeah. And I have bait.
[00:20:41] Speaker B: You have bait?
[00:20:43] Speaker D: Yeah, I have dragon bait.
[00:20:46] Speaker B: Oh, is it us?
[00:20:50] Speaker D: Kind of.
Anybody speak lizard folk?
[00:20:56] Speaker E: I haven't quite learned that one.
[00:20:58] Speaker C: You did learn in a previous encounter that lizard folk speak draconic or abyssal.
[00:21:06] Speaker D: Except I think I speak draconic now. Oh, I speak abyssal.
[00:21:10] Speaker E: Convenient.
[00:21:11] Speaker D: Cool. Very convenient. All right, let's get our group head to the lock and then see if we can bet a dragon into it.
[00:21:20] Speaker C: Yeah, sure.
[00:21:21] Speaker B: We don't have to role play any of this. This is just some her loose ends she wants to tie up. She's going to go say goodbye to twelve and her crew on the boat and tell Dora that she can use her house until she gets back. She's also going to write to Astragar to send a new priest and she's going to let the admiral know that they are going to let him know who they are sending and he should send confirmation that that person is the one who showed up.
[00:21:44] Speaker A: Okay.
[00:21:45] Speaker B: And she is going to reluctantly go see Taeman and thank him for his help the night that Mary attacked us and tell him that we are leaving.
[00:21:53] Speaker C: I need you to roll an insight.
[00:21:55] Speaker F: Roll when you go to Tamen.
[00:21:59] Speaker C: That's a twelve, he says. Oh, yeah, it was nothing. I mean, I heard you were involved. I wanted to save the day.
Just like old times. You know Taman well enough to know.
[00:22:09] Speaker A: That this is completely full of shit.
[00:22:12] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:22:12] Speaker C: He didn't even know you were.
[00:22:15] Speaker B: He didn't know I was there. And she says, taemin, I do not recall one time ever that you saved the day in our whole relationship. And I also know you did not know that I was there. But you did a good thing and I owe you my thanks for that. So thank you.
[00:22:32] Speaker C: I mean, Boulain, sometimes you need to just take the compliments as I throw them. At know you're making this difficult, but you're welcome.
[00:22:40] Speaker B: I will make it much easier. We are heading out.
[00:22:43] Speaker C: I don't know if I'm going to stay here. I might get a boat job or something.
[00:22:47] Speaker B: Good luck, Taeman.
[00:22:49] Speaker C: Yeah, you too. Whatever crazy shit you're getting up know dragons. Like I said, gets up and walks out.
[00:23:00] Speaker E: I wanted to go find like a weird little tinker shop or something. And I wanted to buy a present for dread. I want to find some kind of weird mechanical puzzle or something, if possible.
[00:23:10] Speaker C: A lot of tinkery stuff is available out here. Actually, you can find all kinds of puzzles. Puzzle boxes are really common. You can get in one of those like, ring stuck together puzzles. What are those things called, those 3d puzzles?
[00:23:24] Speaker E: Yeah. I have no idea what they're called. A kinetic puzzle is my best guess.
[00:23:29] Speaker C: You know, that sounds very educational. Yeah, we'll go with that. You can get him a kinetic puzzle.
[00:23:35] Speaker E: I want to find the most complicated looking one.
[00:23:38] Speaker C: All right. Roll me. Persuasion.
[00:23:40] Speaker E: All right.
[00:23:42] Speaker C: I need one that can stump the biggest fucking toddler.
[00:23:45] Speaker E: 17.
[00:23:47] Speaker B: Most adults have a hard time with those puzzles, too.
[00:23:49] Speaker E: I just want to say I do indeed. Creighton could not solve one even like the easy ones. She's, like fiddling with them in the store. Being like, this is impossible.
[00:23:57] Speaker C: But they're all impossible with a 17. The shopkeeper gives you a special one that no one has bought because it's too difficult.
[00:24:08] Speaker E: Yes, it's perfect. How much is it?
[00:24:10] Speaker C: Five gold.
[00:24:11] Speaker E: I'm getting that.
Are we going to have travel time.
[00:24:16] Speaker C: To get to the lock? It takes about a half day, so not a lot of travel time, but some.
[00:24:22] Speaker E: Okay. In that case, can I go ahead and give this to Dredd and have a conversation with him?
[00:24:28] Speaker A: Sure.
[00:24:29] Speaker C: Let me roll Dredd some dice.
[00:24:30] Speaker B: If it takes him longer than five minutes, you know, you did good.
[00:24:34] Speaker C: Actually. He will not solve it in the course of your conversation.
[00:24:39] Speaker E: Yes, that makes sense.
I'm, like, trying to have a heartfelt talk, and he's just like, fucking with the puzzle.
[00:24:46] Speaker B: Of course.
[00:24:47] Speaker C: Snap, snap, snap, snap, snap, snap.
[00:24:48] Speaker F: Push, push, push.
[00:24:49] Speaker C: Snap, snap.
[00:24:50] Speaker E: It's so hard to talk when you're making all those noises.
[00:24:56] Speaker C: Oh, sorry. And he sets it down.
[00:24:59] Speaker E: Dread, I'm worried about this fight coming up. We already fought a dead dragon. We had a lot of help, and a lot of people died.
I just have a really bad feeling about it. I'm not saying we shouldn't do it, but I'm scared.
[00:25:16] Speaker C: Dread gives you a very thoughtful look for a second. And he says, if anybody can kill a dragon, pretty sure it's you.
[00:25:23] Speaker E: I feel like there's a lot that I still don't know about you and what you believe.
If you could change the world, would you?
[00:25:35] Speaker C: I believe that with the right information.
[00:25:40] Speaker F: People will make the right choices. And so truth and facts are the most important things in the whole world.
[00:25:51] Speaker C: And I also believe that that opinion.
[00:25:56] Speaker F: Is not shared by a lot of people.
[00:25:59] Speaker E: It's hard to know what information is, the truth and who you can trust when everyone has an agenda.
[00:26:05] Speaker F: Politics is inherently evil.
[00:26:10] Speaker E: When you don't know what to do, how do you decide what's the right course when you don't have all of the information?
[00:26:16] Speaker C: I pick someone I trust who has good instincts, and I look for information.
But until I find it, Max has pretty good judgment.
[00:26:26] Speaker E: I could see that a little. But you've known him a lot longer than you've known me.
[00:26:32] Speaker C: Max understands people.
[00:26:34] Speaker F: That's usually where I don't have enough information.
[00:26:38] Speaker E: Dread. If something happens to me, I want to be burned, and I want a rose bush planted in some soil with my ashes in it.
[00:26:46] Speaker C: He sort of tilts his head to the side and pulls out a notebook and writes it down exactly as you said it.
[00:26:54] Speaker E: The darkest roses you could find.
[00:26:58] Speaker C: If something happens to me, take care of Max.
[00:27:03] Speaker E: Of course.
[00:27:04] Speaker F: He's a dummy.
[00:27:06] Speaker E: Yeah, but he's a good man.
[00:27:10] Speaker B: He's a good dummy.
[00:27:12] Speaker E: Well, we should get some rest.
[00:27:15] Speaker D: Right.
Here's my thought. They get up there, and we set up to use the lock as a trap. Then we find a band of lizard folk and fight them a bit and then let at least one of them live, telling them that there is someone notable who wants to talk to Bison at the lock.
I think maybe I have the right name to drop.
[00:27:42] Speaker B: Do you know one?
[00:27:44] Speaker D: Yeah. In some of our books and around, I've heard of a red dragon named Nodig who was kind of a big deal, and it might be enough to perk this dragon's attention.
[00:27:58] Speaker B: All right, that sounds like as good of a lure as any. If we cannot get the allfather to enter the lock.
[00:28:05] Speaker D: Right. Well, we can try to find that boat that it loves and just put it in the lock.
[00:28:10] Speaker B: I think that boat is likely.
[00:28:12] Speaker E: Yeah, he ruined that boat.
[00:28:14] Speaker B: I think he probably destroyed that boat with his love.
[00:28:18] Speaker E: We watched it.
There were so many flinters.
[00:28:41] Speaker A: Welcome, apprentices. It's time again for your history lesson. Today we will discuss the rather preposterous gnomeish pantheon. Gnomes, as you know, migrated from the feywild to live out their lives in the mortal realm. When they first migrated, resources were quite scarce, and they found themselves in constant contest with other fay folk and even the dragons Od. You would say that a creature so small would find itself in contest with dragons. Well, gnomes had a peculiar pantheon centered around a God known as glitter gold. This deity was sort of a concentrated force of gnomeishness. It was dedicated to being lucky in various forms of good hearted mischief. Though fiercely protective and weirdly attracted to gold, the 13th day of each month was considered a holy day dedicated to glitter gold, in which gnomes would gather for joke telling and other community resources. They would pull together their wealth, for example, to do good deeds. Now, over time, it became clear that not all gnomes were dedicated to the good collection of gold. Quickly, gold coins and gold nuggets became a common symbol of the deity. In time, the pantheon added a God specifically for the gathering of wealth. For selfish reasons. The gnomish obsession with gold brought them into conflict with dragons, who, as you know, have themselves an obsession with gold, specifically the dragon descended race of cobalt tasked with gathering gold for their draconica masters. The gnomish obsession with mischief left them without any allies to counter the draconic threat. And it was then they added gods of stone and illusion, permitting the gnomes to run and hide for their lives. We now know today that the pantheon was strictly preposterous. Not only did they have no creation myth, seeing the world as simply existing, they were utterly dedicated to the idea of luck, which has no place in modern society. With the emergence of the truth by our prophet Astragarian contessa, it became clear that while there is some chaos inherent in the universe, the idea that it would favor one over another is preposterous. In our meritocratic society, we understand that what was considered luck was simply chance applied to one's talents and preparation. You will notice there is no true God of luck, because luck simply doesn't exist. The gnomish gods weren't even powerful, Faye, just figments of a silly culture with backwards ways. Today, gnomes are quite rare, but they still maintain a trademark better sense of humor than the average mortal creature. Perhaps they have overwhelmingly turned their attention to divine hammer and begun to leave their fay heritage behind, preferring instead to focus on the world of innovations, crafts and invention. Well, there you have it, apprentices. Even the brightest among us, can be misled by fantasy and a good story. But as with all the world's historic false faiths, we leave them to the history books and focus our attention on the future.
All right, apprentices, back to workload.
[00:32:02] Speaker C: All right, when we left off, you all had decided on a plan, or half of a plan, 12% of a plan, maybe 11%, which was, hey, there's this lock, and it has two doors that, like, pinch closed. Let's catch a dragon in that, using some confluence of plan. And that seemed like a pretty good idea. And I will say that Nate went off and researched fluid mechanics and did, in fact, determine that water pressure is fucking terrifying.
[00:32:32] Speaker B: You're the dungeon manager. See, you did all the research that we needed to do for our plan.
[00:32:38] Speaker C: I'm clearly a dungeon first line manager. To be clear, there's no directing going on here.
[00:32:45] Speaker B: Middle manager, are you a middle manager?
[00:32:47] Speaker C: Not yet, no. I got to work up to that.
[00:32:50] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:32:50] Speaker C: Dungeon middle management comes later.
[00:32:52] Speaker E: Okay.
[00:32:53] Speaker C: It turns out that the dragon weighs significantly less than the quantity of force water pressure can produce. And so I did come up with some mechanics for this trap you could create.
[00:33:05] Speaker E: So brilliant.
[00:33:06] Speaker C: But mostly I just confirmed that that would work.
[00:33:09] Speaker B: Here's what we're going to do. We're going to send for Gray street to meet us at the lock, and you're going to talk to him about the lock mechanics. And then he's going to set it all up for us and do all the timing.
[00:33:20] Speaker A: Sure.
[00:33:24] Speaker B: I'm the middle manager.
[00:33:26] Speaker C: Yeah, I think you guys did a lot of middle management in resolving Turtle Bay.
[00:33:32] Speaker B: So mean we did that with minimal death and destruction. Well, no, maybe not minimal.
[00:33:37] Speaker C: I mean, I don't know what it says about you that you sought out dicky the devious to be one of your employees, but it kept us from.
[00:33:46] Speaker B: Being the dealers of the death and destruction. It was really him. We just asked him to do it for us.
[00:33:52] Speaker C: They were true servants of the empire.
[00:33:54] Speaker E: I'm just happy Creedon got some proper tourism in with pirate duels and buying hats.
[00:34:00] Speaker B: Boulain feels like she did Creed and.
[00:34:02] Speaker E: Swimming on her experience in Turtle Bay.
It was her best vacation ever.
[00:34:09] Speaker C: You even did the underground tour?
[00:34:11] Speaker E: Very briefly.
[00:34:13] Speaker B: Got to see the slave trade up close and personal, and then did nothing about it.
[00:34:18] Speaker E: Oh, yeah.
[00:34:19] Speaker C: Can only make one coin lord angry.
[00:34:22] Speaker F: At you at a time.
[00:34:23] Speaker B: It's true.
[00:34:23] Speaker D: That's really the recommended amount.
[00:34:26] Speaker B: Do not let them band together against a common cause. I was serious about sending for Gray street because he would know the lock inside and out and could help us with the engineering on that.
[00:34:36] Speaker C: He would. You can recruit a 70 something year old man.
[00:34:39] Speaker B: The biggest question is, how are we going to lure it into the gates.
[00:34:42] Speaker E: And I think that's what's the bait. If we could do anything with the.
[00:34:45] Speaker B: Allfather, which means baiting the allfather, because it's not like we're going to talk to him. What do you think, Zerus?
[00:34:53] Speaker D: I think the lock is a good plan, but what bait to use is still questionable. I mean, I don't know why this dragon wouldn't just send the lizard folk to take care of any problem he sees first.
[00:35:05] Speaker B: How bad of an idea would it be to steal from this dragon and put that loot on the boat and have it chase the boat into the lock?
[00:35:17] Speaker D: This is a terrible and wonderful idea.
[00:35:22] Speaker E: I like that idea.
[00:35:23] Speaker D: I really like this idea. It is.
[00:35:26] Speaker E: It's scary, though. We need to make sure that we have good mobility.
[00:35:28] Speaker B: It is insane as ideas go, but we need to figure out exactly how to do that.
[00:35:33] Speaker E: Which might mean we should go ahead.
[00:35:36] Speaker B: With Max Dredd and Chom and go ahead of the navy and scope out the situation.
[00:35:41] Speaker D: And clearly we'll have to disguise ourselves as lizard men.
[00:35:44] Speaker F: Yes, clearly.
[00:35:46] Speaker E: If only we had alter self potions. Although we only have the one set.
[00:35:50] Speaker B: What we need to do is some recon work on what the situation is and then choose that moment, that hour, very carefully. But we need to time this theft when the boats are coming through so that we can put what we stole on the boats and have it pursue us.
[00:36:05] Speaker E: I mean, where is its horde in relation to the lock, though? Because if it's a long distance, like the dragon can move a lot faster than us.
[00:36:14] Speaker C: Xeris has the location of the horde provided to him by Traffron beach crown. It is under a mound of mud and dirt, so you have to swim under to get to it. And you have an x on a map. It is probably four days of grueling marching into the swamp. Unless you have some travel tricks, we're.
[00:36:36] Speaker D: Going straight to the lair and we're just going to wreck it. So let's go.
[00:36:41] Speaker E: Yeah, but are we going to steal something now?
[00:36:43] Speaker D: It sounds like if the plan is to walk through the swamp, grab a coin and head to the lock, yes, that happens.
[00:36:51] Speaker B: Now we have to go do this and get back to the lock like post haste.
[00:36:56] Speaker E: Okay.
[00:36:57] Speaker B: I'm sure it's going to be fine.
[00:36:58] Speaker C: So you hop on canoes.
[00:37:01] Speaker B: Oh, we're just going.
[00:37:02] Speaker D: We're going now.
[00:37:05] Speaker E: Okay.
[00:37:06] Speaker C: You need three of them. How do you want to space this out?
[00:37:09] Speaker D: I think it's one strong and one not strong each.
[00:37:13] Speaker C: That means Creedon and Dredd do not.
[00:37:15] Speaker F: Get to ride together.
[00:37:16] Speaker D: Right. It's dread and Max, me and Creedon, boulain and chum.
[00:37:23] Speaker E: Given how the last dragonfly went with Creedon, I don't know if she wants to near her.
[00:37:27] Speaker C: You head out for the first 6 hours or so of boating. You are pushing your way up a lazy river. It does require some continuous rowing. Give me a d 20 roll, please, Mandy.
[00:37:43] Speaker B: While we are rowing, I rolled a ten.
[00:37:46] Speaker C: Neither lucky nor unlucky. You see no signs of the dragon or the allfather in your hours up to the first lock, you arrive at south lock Whitelock, a really small six building town that manages the lock just outside of Turtle Bay. This is where Miri was before she fled justice.
[00:38:10] Speaker B: Can we retcon that I did, ascending to get Gray street to meet us there?
[00:38:13] Speaker C: It's a two day trip, so he.
[00:38:14] Speaker F: Will be another day and a half.
[00:38:16] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:38:16] Speaker C: And you will be in the swamp by then.
[00:38:18] Speaker B: Oh, that's true.
[00:38:19] Speaker C: But he could be waiting for you when you get back.
[00:38:21] Speaker E: Okay.
[00:38:21] Speaker C: The lock operators are running smoothly. They open the lock for you. You kind of get a good sense of how quickly it opens and closes. It occurs to you that if you can get the dragon close to it while it's closed, it can open fairly quickly.
Closing it on a dragon, not actually a great move. You have a drawing of the sort of locks blueprint and as you watch the lock open and close it seems.
[00:38:46] Speaker A: To be fairly accurate.
[00:38:47] Speaker C: With that, you pass the lock unless you choose to stop and talk to the lock operators.
[00:38:53] Speaker B: Should we warn them what we're doing? I feel like the lock operators are going to need to be complicit in what we're doing.
[00:38:59] Speaker E: Oh, I think that that's not a bad idea too.
[00:39:01] Speaker D: Sure. Yeah.
[00:39:03] Speaker E: They probably won't want to, though.
[00:39:05] Speaker B: I mean, we can inform them there will be a dragon coming this way and this is a way to stop it.
[00:39:11] Speaker C: You're going to get back and have no lock operators.
[00:39:13] Speaker B: But Grace Reed will be here and he's crazy. He's crazy enough to do.
[00:39:18] Speaker C: He is no longer afraid of death.
[00:39:21] Speaker B: All right, who has mad persuasion skills?
[00:39:23] Speaker E: I'm not half bad.
[00:39:25] Speaker B: I get a five.
[00:39:26] Speaker E: I have.
[00:39:27] Speaker D: My persuasion is also five.
[00:39:29] Speaker E: I have seven. So maybe I go.
[00:39:31] Speaker B: So Creedon is going to do the talking on this.
[00:39:35] Speaker C: What's your sales pitch?
[00:39:37] Speaker B: We could help too. Give her an advantage role.
[00:39:39] Speaker E: I know. I'm wondering if we should tell in.
[00:39:41] Speaker C: Eight days time a dragon will arrive here and we're going to pinch it in a lock with your help, you're going to do all the work with the levers and the knobs.
[00:39:54] Speaker D: What we tell them is that gray street's coming to help us with a project and to listen to what he says.
[00:40:01] Speaker E: Oh yeah.
[00:40:02] Speaker B: Okay. Yeah. That's how we should put that. Because he's got authority, right?
[00:40:05] Speaker D: He doesn't have authority, but he's got seniority.
[00:40:08] Speaker C: Okay, Claire, give me a roll.
[00:40:10] Speaker E: All right.
[00:40:12] Speaker C: You have advantage, Claire.
[00:40:14] Speaker E: Oh, that's cool. 26 solid.
[00:40:17] Speaker C: So they're like, oh, cool, a big project. That sounds great. We're doing pretty good at learning this lock thing. They thank you for your time. Do you need anything?
[00:40:26] Speaker E: Glass of water would be great.
[00:40:28] Speaker C: Okay, well, they get you some water. I need a survival role from one.
[00:40:32] Speaker E: Person, preferably not me.
[00:40:35] Speaker B: I get a three on survival.
[00:40:37] Speaker C: I believe Boulain is the best we have.
[00:40:40] Speaker D: Boulain is.
[00:40:42] Speaker B: Oh, that's not bad. That's a 17 plus three is 20.
[00:40:45] Speaker C: You make pretty good time for the first 6 hours and arrive at a chunk of land that rises up out of the swamp. It's covered in really tall grasses and marsh and some old weird looking trees. Mangroves, I think is what they're called. Giving you a dry spot to camp, start a fire, chill for the evening. Is that the plan?
[00:41:05] Speaker B: Do we have a fire? Do we want to do.
[00:41:07] Speaker D: Yeah. I don't know about a fire, but.
[00:41:09] Speaker C: Otherwise, yeah, you have a cold night in the swamp.
[00:41:12] Speaker B: Better than a dead night in the swamp.
[00:41:14] Speaker C: It is an early morning for you. And the reason it's an early morning.
[00:41:19] Speaker F: Is because dread shakes you all individually.
[00:41:22] Speaker C: Awake and whispers very quietly, we're being watched.
[00:41:27] Speaker D: Lizard men.
[00:41:29] Speaker F: I can't tell from this distance.
[00:41:30] Speaker C: It keeps coming out of the water.
[00:41:32] Speaker F: And looking at us.
[00:41:33] Speaker B: Is it a lizard?
[00:41:34] Speaker C: Well, come here and look. And he points.
And along the water's surface, clear out near another pile of mangrove surrounded by all kinds of grass. There's a little bump that you can see come out of the water and.
[00:41:51] Speaker F: Then go back down.
[00:41:52] Speaker B: By little do you mean three times as large as one of our canoes?
[00:41:56] Speaker F: No.
[00:41:57] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:42:00] Speaker E: Got to check.
[00:42:01] Speaker C: Consider it like a basketball. Bobs up and then disappears.
[00:42:05] Speaker B: Is this still dark?
[00:42:06] Speaker C: It's pretty dark at this juncture. Still like the sun is technically up.
[00:42:10] Speaker B: It's like pre dawn.
[00:42:10] Speaker C: Yeah, it's hard to see.
[00:42:12] Speaker B: Okay. But I can see in the dark. So can I see what this is?
[00:42:16] Speaker C: You can roll me.
[00:42:17] Speaker A: A disadvantaged perception check.
[00:42:20] Speaker B: So that's a 21?
[00:42:21] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:42:22] Speaker C: You get just enough sunlight on it to tell that it is a scaled creature that you're pretty sure it's their head.
[00:42:29] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:42:30] Speaker C: And they have a small muzzle, so you're guessing lizard men?
[00:42:35] Speaker B: Lily says it's definitely one of the lizard men. The question is, is it one of the dragons or is it one of the all fathers?
[00:42:41] Speaker D: I don't know that we stopped to care about it too much. Let's just keep going. If something larger comes after us, then something larger comes after us.
[00:42:49] Speaker B: All righty.
[00:42:50] Speaker D: I mean, we can try to stop it before it can contact someone else, but knowing the way these things go, that might just cause more problems.
[00:42:58] Speaker B: This is true.
[00:42:59] Speaker E: If we're going into the dragon's lair, this thing could be telling it that we're coming and we could get ambushed by the dragon and all of its followers. This is my concern.
[00:43:09] Speaker B: There's nothing to say that that one is the only one out there. It is just the only one we saw.
[00:43:14] Speaker E: Yeah, but we know for sure that this one is here.
[00:43:17] Speaker D: Actually, Creedon, can you help us to have a conversation with it?
[00:43:22] Speaker E: Oh, yes. I could do a ritual of comprehend language.
[00:43:26] Speaker D: I was actually meaning something a little more aggressive.
[00:43:30] Speaker E: Oh, you want me to charm. Okay. I could use suggestion on it because.
[00:43:36] Speaker D: I can already speak with it.
[00:43:38] Speaker E: That's right. Because you speak abyssal.
[00:43:40] Speaker B: Right.
[00:43:40] Speaker D: I don't think it's friendly.
[00:43:41] Speaker E: This thing must see us all, like, peeking out at it.
[00:43:44] Speaker B: Right.
[00:43:45] Speaker E: I've got to try to cast suggestion.
[00:43:47] Speaker C: On it so it is at quite a distance. So I believe you'll probably climb back into your canoes and act like you're leaving.
So I need a deception roll to get close.
[00:43:59] Speaker E: That'll be a 17.
[00:44:01] Speaker C: So you hang back a little bit from the rest of the group with your canoe, and when the creature pops its head back up in the swampy water, you're pretty close to it. You hit it with a suggestion spell.
[00:44:15] Speaker F: It rolls.
[00:44:16] Speaker C: A saving throw.
[00:44:17] Speaker E: Yes. DC is 16.
[00:44:21] Speaker C: What do you suggest to do?
[00:44:23] Speaker E: Come into the canoe and surrender to us.
[00:44:25] Speaker C: It's going to interpret this a little differently, but it's going to try to comply. So it swims directly up to you, puts both clawed hands on the edge and raises its head and says, it.
[00:44:43] Speaker F: Occurs to me that you are without a guide.
[00:44:49] Speaker E: That's correct.
[00:44:50] Speaker D: Yeah. It said we're without a guide.
[00:44:52] Speaker F: You are in a dangerous place.
The all father does not wish your death.
[00:44:59] Speaker B: That's one of the all fathers.
[00:45:00] Speaker D: Excellent.
[00:45:01] Speaker B: We should get this guy to work with us.
[00:45:04] Speaker F: Why are you here?
[00:45:05] Speaker E: Wait, so what language is it speaking?
[00:45:07] Speaker C: It's got common right now.
[00:45:09] Speaker E: Okay.
[00:45:09] Speaker C: It's clearly not its first language. It's struggling with the words. Its mouth isn't really meant to make these sounds, but it seems to speak it.
[00:45:17] Speaker E: Okay, I guess. I turned to my party and I kind of shrug and say, like, should we tell them what we're here to do?
[00:45:24] Speaker D: I think saying that we're here to root out the enemies of the Allfather is sufficient.
[00:45:29] Speaker E: We are not here to disrupt the allfather in any way. We are actually seeking to further some of the Allfather's gains. We are looking to drive out bisonth.
[00:45:39] Speaker F: I see Bisonth has recently taken an interest in the allfather. An unhealthy interest. This would not be good. You are not exiles?
[00:45:52] Speaker B: No. Would the allfather be interested in helping us route bison?
[00:45:59] Speaker F: The allfather is a simple creature. It is the reason we seek to emulate him. He wishes for very simple things. Fighting a battle is not one of them. He fights to eat or to survive. Nothing more.
[00:46:17] Speaker E: I can respect that. Is there a way that you can communicate to the allfather that we are not its enemy?
[00:46:25] Speaker F: I can speak these words to the Allfather. If it is hungry, it will not matter.
[00:46:34] Speaker E: And how has the food supply been lately?
[00:46:37] Speaker F: Good.
Your people send sacrifices to the swamp.
[00:46:43] Speaker B: Regularly in the form of exiles.
[00:46:47] Speaker F: You call them exiles?
[00:46:49] Speaker D: Yeah. We are definitely not exiles.
[00:46:53] Speaker F: I try to help the exiles when I can. It is an unfair practice to send a beast without claws to fend for itself in the swamp.
[00:47:04] Speaker D: That's true.
[00:47:05] Speaker E: You do not intentionally drive food to the Allfather.
[00:47:09] Speaker F: The Allfather is more than capable of feeding himself. It is his efficiency that we seek to emulate.
[00:47:17] Speaker B: I just remembered that somebody running around these parts. The ex mayor of Sternheim.
[00:47:24] Speaker C: He has a knife.
[00:47:25] Speaker B: He has a knife.
He has a claw. It's not a creature without a claw.
[00:47:30] Speaker E: Can I describe what he looks like to this?
[00:47:33] Speaker A: Sure.
[00:47:34] Speaker C: Wizard.
[00:47:34] Speaker E: Folk could ask if Val. Yeah, Mayor Val could ask if he's aided this particular gentleman or seen him be consumed.
[00:47:41] Speaker F: This creature you describe is not known to me.
[00:47:45] Speaker E: It is a big swamp.
[00:47:47] Speaker F: Very big. You are nearing numerous hunting grounds. You are on the dangerous side of the swamp. If you persist in this direction, you will find many dangers.
[00:48:04] Speaker E: We are seeking Bison's lair.
[00:48:06] Speaker F: You are heading in the correct direction.
[00:48:08] Speaker E: We have to go through if we want to get there.
[00:48:11] Speaker F: The swamp is not a straightforward thing, but it would add significant time to your travels to avoid the hunting grounds of its many, many creatures.
[00:48:23] Speaker D: Would you be able to help us avoid some of those dangers? Travel with us.
[00:48:27] Speaker F: I can point them out to you, but if you wish to avoid them, you should go up to the city and come down from the north.
[00:48:38] Speaker C: You immediately know that would add two.
[00:48:40] Speaker F: Full days to your trip.
[00:48:42] Speaker B: We are a little pressed for time.
[00:48:44] Speaker E: Yeah. How many days do we have?
[00:48:46] Speaker C: It's four days to get there, four days back, and a day in the middle. And that is the day the navy is going to be at Southlock. Okay, so you have just enough time. You might want to try to make.
[00:48:58] Speaker F: Up some, not lose it.
[00:49:00] Speaker E: Yeah. Oh, God. I don't want to go. Like, what do we have that could keep the all father away from us?
[00:49:07] Speaker B: Though.
[00:49:09] Speaker E: We do have the charm of.
[00:49:11] Speaker B: The green man, we do have the green man's blessing. Yeah.
[00:49:14] Speaker F: The all father does not care about you. He eats fish and game. I guess if you stray too close to the water, you may be consumed.
[00:49:24] Speaker E: Oh, well, I thought that you were saying that the Allfather is regularly consuming people.
[00:49:31] Speaker B: Exile.
[00:49:31] Speaker E: Humans. Humanoids.
[00:49:34] Speaker F: If you stray too close to the water, you will look like food to the Allfather. But you are in a boat, so.
[00:49:42] Speaker B: As long as we stay in the boats, we should be fine.
[00:49:45] Speaker F: Yes. And I can tell you the all father is not deeper in the swamp today. So you will be moving away from him.
[00:49:54] Speaker B: Great.
[00:49:54] Speaker E: Well, that sounds like good news to me. Let's ski, daddle.
[00:49:57] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:49:58] Speaker B: Does he get in the boat with them or does he lead in the water?
[00:50:02] Speaker C: Your boats are full.
[00:50:03] Speaker F: He's going to have to swim.
[00:50:04] Speaker E: Also, before we left Turtle Bay, Creedon made sure to get some fine black mesh netting to put over her hat so she has a mosquito net.
[00:50:13] Speaker C: Oh, good. You're probably the only one not getting.
[00:50:16] Speaker B: Eaten alive if it's daytime, Belaine's got her veil on.
[00:50:20] Speaker E: I'm taking a page out of Elaine's book.
[00:50:23] Speaker C: You head forward. About 30 minutes later, the creature who.
[00:50:29] Speaker F: Is with you, his head bops up.
[00:50:31] Speaker C: Again and he says, you are about.
[00:50:33] Speaker F: To reach the mangrove, hunted by the danger weeds. I do not know the word for these danger weeds in your tongue.
[00:50:43] Speaker E: Some kind of living vine, maybe?
[00:50:46] Speaker F: Yes.
[00:50:46] Speaker B: We are not near the thorns, are we?
[00:50:49] Speaker A: No.
[00:50:49] Speaker E: It might just be a creature that dwells within the swamp.
[00:50:53] Speaker F: The swamp is quite dangerous. The danger weeds are best left alone.
[00:51:00] Speaker E: How do we identify them?
[00:51:01] Speaker F: If they have eaten recently, you will see the bones.
[00:51:05] Speaker B: Is this like Venus fly trapped or something?
[00:51:09] Speaker E: Okay, well, let's just. If we see a corpse, we don't go to check it out. We don't try to put it to rest. We stay away.
[00:51:15] Speaker B: I can say prayers from a distance.
[00:51:17] Speaker E: Yeah, good to know.
[00:51:19] Speaker F: Good advice. I will swim under these mangroves to avoid this threat and meet you on the other side.
[00:51:27] Speaker E: This guy is so nice.
[00:51:28] Speaker C: What is your name in your tongue?
[00:51:31] Speaker F: It is indescribable. You may call me.
[00:51:36] Speaker C: And then he lets off this, like, rattling hiss. That is not something you can do with your mouth.
[00:51:43] Speaker B: Indescribable it is. That's what we're calling them.
[00:51:58] Speaker A: And that is our show for today. Special thanks Todd Ferguson and my pet machine for our tunes. Julie at elaborate Flight of fancy for our logo, and you listeners who leave us a rating and review wherever you listen to this podcast. With that friends, what will our heroes find waiting for them deeper in the swamp?
Find out next time on carrots and suffering at DND Odyssey.
