Episode Transcript
[00:00:00] Speaker A: Sam.
[00:00:29] Speaker B: Hello and welcome to Carrots and suffering A-D-D odyssey. My name is Nate, and I am your dungeon master. An excited fan of the Dungeons and Dragons franchise from Wizards of the coast. We are not affiliated with the company, but we do use their game system and the history in our storytelling. I hope you enjoy. Don't forget to leave us a rating and review.
Last time on on Carrots and Suffering our heroes set out to plan to kill a dragon, and they spent a lot of time trying to get onto some kind of even footing with the dragon in its watery domain.
[00:01:02] Speaker A: Before we leave Turtle Bay, we should definitely hunt all of our b is start getting some good equipment.
[00:01:08] Speaker C: I do know where to go to get certain less illicit potions.
[00:01:14] Speaker B: A water breathing potion is 375.
[00:01:17] Speaker A: Oh, my God. Highway robbery. The real criminal is used is still the six potions of alter self. You're picking up for another one of the master's weird parties?
Yeah.
[00:01:36] Speaker D: Exactly what I was thinking.
[00:01:39] Speaker B: Guided by a tattoo of a lock design, our heroes decide to try to trap Bisontha, silent Fang, dragon God, king of the swamp, in the deluge water pressure when the dam opens. But they needed a plan to get the dragon to show to their trap. You all had decided on a plan, which was, hey, there's this lock, and it has two doors that, like, pinch closed. Let's catch a dragon in that.
[00:02:05] Speaker D: We're going straight to the lair, and we're just going to wreck it, so let's go.
[00:02:10] Speaker A: Yeah, but are we going to steal something now?
[00:02:12] Speaker D: It sounds like if the plan is to walk through the swamp, grab a coin, and head to the lock. Yes, that happens.
[00:02:20] Speaker B: Now our heroes set out for the dragon's lair. They encounter a guide, a lizard man aligned with the Allfather, a truly colossal crocodile believed to be blessed by the green man, god of the world and survival of the fittest.
[00:02:35] Speaker A: We are not here to disrupt the Allfather in any way. We are actually seeking to further some of the Allfather's gains. We are looking to drive out bison danger weeds.
[00:02:47] Speaker B: I do not know the word for these danger weeds in your tongue.
[00:02:51] Speaker A: Some kind of living bind, maybe?
[00:02:54] Speaker B: He lets off this, like, rattling hiss. That is not something you can do with your mouth.
[00:03:00] Speaker C: Indescribable it. Is that's what we're calling them?
[00:03:05] Speaker B: Let's get into it.
Hi, I'm Nate, and I will be your dungeon master.
[00:03:17] Speaker C: I'm Mandy. I play Boulain, the Grave domain death cleric who is mixed feelings about leaving home again.
[00:03:23] Speaker A: Hi, I'm Claire, and I play Creedon, the warlock of something.
She's not sure right now.
[00:03:32] Speaker D: Hi, I'm Robert. I play Zerus dragon bane and Boone ODing.
[00:03:38] Speaker B: So Teams has this cool coaching app that I turn on for work that gives me feedback on my talking, and it does not like the word master, and it just scolded me for using the word Master. It says to you, Master might be offensive or non inclusive. In some cases, you should knock it off. And every time I say it flashes it up again.
[00:03:59] Speaker C: What does it think about the word player?
[00:04:01] Speaker B: I'll try it, I'll try it. Player. It did not correct.
[00:04:04] Speaker D: Okay, well, what about player?
[00:04:06] Speaker A: At some point it's going to get on you for advocating violence anyway.
[00:04:10] Speaker B: Apparently I am a dungeon primary today.
[00:04:14] Speaker C: You're a dungeon boss, a dungeon leader.
[00:04:18] Speaker B: A dungeon boss implies you're going to defeat me.
[00:04:20] Speaker C: Yeah, well, I think we are. Well, we're working with you on this.
[00:04:26] Speaker B: Okay, got you.
And he sinks below the water, true to his word. About five minutes of boating later, there's a massive land bar covered in such thick vegetation, it becomes evidently clear that you are either going to lose several hours going around it or you are going to hop up, pick up your boats, and walk across it.
[00:04:52] Speaker A: Let's tough it.
[00:04:53] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:04:53] Speaker B: What is boulain's? Passive perception.
[00:04:56] Speaker C: 16.
[00:04:57] Speaker B: That's probably the highest in the room. Dreads is a 17.
[00:05:00] Speaker C: Oh, got me beat.
[00:05:02] Speaker B: He has a feet.
[00:05:03] Speaker C: He does have a feet.
[00:05:04] Speaker B: Dread will spot it first and he is not walking in the front. And so he will immediately go, what? And he will point and lane. There is this old tree, old growth tree just covered in all kinds of vines and stuff. But about 7ft off the ground, there is a human looking skull just sitting in the vines.
[00:05:28] Speaker C: Can we get around this easily? The whole tree?
[00:05:31] Speaker B: You can walk around it.
[00:05:32] Speaker C: All right. She says we should give this a wide berth.
[00:05:35] Speaker A: Also, as a reminder, Creedon has Dora's dagger, which I think just kind of gives me blind sight in front of me as well. That helps me.
[00:05:43] Speaker B: I'll let you know. You have 30ft of blind sight and you can't be surprised.
[00:05:47] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:05:48] Speaker B: So you start working your way around it, and this is a good thing, creedon, you get within 30ft of something and your mystical senses that are given to you by your various warlock items alert you of two things. Some of the vines that you are about 30ft from move ever so slightly, and you know, because of your blind sense that it's not something in the vines, it's the vines.
[00:06:14] Speaker A: Can I look around and see? Is there like an end to them?
[00:06:17] Speaker B: If you get a little you get a little closer, you could probably figure out the shape of this thing.
[00:06:23] Speaker A: I have a bad feeling about those vines up there. I can't tell if there's a way around, but I think I see them moving.
[00:06:29] Speaker C: Can I roll nature to see if we know what these are?
[00:06:32] Speaker B: Sure.
[00:06:32] Speaker C: That's a 16.
[00:06:33] Speaker B: You are fairly certain that when this thing lies still that it is indistinguishable from a plant. You're looking at it, though. The word shambling mound come to mind.
[00:06:44] Speaker A: Oh, shit.
[00:06:46] Speaker B: You know that they are an intensely aggressive, predatory piece of plant. They're quite large. They tend to be elongated and sort of stretched flat sometimes. But, like, if they pull themselves up into a blob, they can be the size of a horse. They can easily swallow a man. You're pretty sure you have spotted two of them now.
[00:07:07] Speaker A: Oh, no.
[00:07:08] Speaker C: Do they hunt in packs?
[00:07:10] Speaker B: They're created when lightning strikes vegetation. A large lightning strike could create several at once.
[00:07:20] Speaker C: Belain shares what she knows about the Shambling Mound. She says these are predatory things that are quite large and quite dangerous. And there are at least two of them. We need to try to get around them. They can move.
[00:07:33] Speaker D: All right, let's sneak.
[00:07:35] Speaker C: We will sneak, sneak, sneak.
[00:07:38] Speaker A: Do our best.
[00:07:39] Speaker B: This is going to be a group challenge. Everybody roll me. Stealth plus one is 16.
[00:07:45] Speaker A: I got a 14. We should have done guidance before this. We're fools.
[00:07:49] Speaker D: I have gotten an eight.
[00:07:51] Speaker C: Oh, no.
[00:07:52] Speaker B: So you all are slipping around. I have rolled for your three compatriots. It doesn't go great on their end.
[00:07:58] Speaker C: Oh, no. Shit.
[00:08:00] Speaker B: Which is not representative of them walking along, making a lot of noise, creeping along quietly when somebody steps on something and then it tries to eat them. So the good news is you have identified the location of two of these things and you have gone the other way. You do run into a third one. It is going to attack. But first I need an initiative. Role creedon. You will be allowed to act on the first round of initiative because you cannot be surprised. And, Zeros, what is your passive perception?
[00:08:27] Speaker D: I love that you've asked this question. And my passive perception is twelve.
[00:08:31] Speaker B: Boulain. You will not be surprised because when it moves, you will know.
[00:08:34] Speaker C: Okay.
[00:08:35] Speaker B: And Dread will not be surprised, but everybody else will be.
[00:08:39] Speaker A: I got a non natural 20 on my initiative.
[00:08:41] Speaker C: I got a 19, man.
[00:08:43] Speaker A: I already used one of my spells.
[00:08:45] Speaker D: Oh, I've gotten a nine.
[00:08:47] Speaker C: Zuris, you're not allowed to die before we get to the dragon. This is your won't.
[00:08:52] Speaker D: I won't. That's fine.
[00:08:54] Speaker B: Creedon. Max steps on a vine, and it recoils and then rears up off the face of a tree like a wall of plant matter and attempts to eat him. Your turn.
[00:09:07] Speaker A: Can I use telekinetic to pull him kind of out of it a little bit, like 5ft towards me?
[00:09:13] Speaker B: You can pull Max 5ft. And I will say that that will give the plant disadvantage on attacking him. And you have your normal action because you can't be surprised.
[00:09:24] Speaker A: So I do do that first, and then I will give it the classic eldritch blast.
[00:09:29] Speaker B: Okay, that's not great.
[00:09:32] Speaker A: 13.
[00:09:33] Speaker B: You fire at it and it goes sort of between the vines. This thing isn't super solid and it makes it hard to hit it somehow.
So you don't succeed in connecting. But you do protect Max to some degree. Boulain.
[00:09:47] Speaker C: Once Max is yanked out of the way, is going to cast sacred flame at it and needs to make a.
[00:09:53] Speaker B: Deck save it does not. Very dexterous and quite large. Gets a 13.
[00:10:00] Speaker C: All right, no, that's not enough. And then as a bonus action, she's going to cast spiritual weapon. 15 to hit.
[00:10:05] Speaker B: Spiritual weapon will connect.
[00:10:07] Speaker C: Does seven radiant damage and the spiritual weapon does OOH. That's maximum. Does 14 force damage.
[00:10:14] Speaker B: So total of 21 dread fires reflexively at it as he was also not surprised. But does not hit. This creature is going to try to eat Max.
[00:10:25] Speaker C: No, we like Max. Big dummy.
[00:10:28] Speaker A: It doesn't have advantage now.
[00:10:30] Speaker B: Does not. No, it lost its advantage thanks to Creedon's move. Going to chomp at our friend Max and miss terribly with the first swing.
And miss terribly with the second swing.
[00:10:44] Speaker C: Excellent.
[00:10:45] Speaker B: And now we start the real round, the post surprise round. Creedon.
[00:10:49] Speaker C: Oh, wow.
[00:10:50] Speaker A: Already up again.
[00:10:51] Speaker B: Half the party is only just figuring out they're being attacked.
[00:10:54] Speaker A: I'm just going to eldritch blast it.
19 to hit.
[00:10:58] Speaker B: That hits.
[00:10:59] Speaker A: All right, maximum damage, 15 force damage.
Oh, wait, I fire two beams. I'm going to roll that second one. Oh, that one. I got it too. That is right out.
[00:11:10] Speaker B: That does not hit. No, Belain.
[00:11:12] Speaker C: Okay, Belain is going to cast toll the dead and then also hit it with the spiritual weapon as bonus action.
[00:11:18] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:11:18] Speaker C: Gets an 817 necrotic damage.
[00:11:22] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:11:23] Speaker C: And then the spiritual weapon 13 plus six is 1919. Will hit seven.
[00:11:29] Speaker B: That's going to bring us to the mound. So nearest person is probably Max, followed by who else would have been in the front, by the way?
[00:11:36] Speaker D: Probably me.
[00:11:36] Speaker B: Comes up and it's going to swing fists at Xeris. Xeris a giant planty fist. Does a 15 hit you?
[00:11:44] Speaker D: It does.
[00:11:45] Speaker B: How about a 13?
[00:11:47] Speaker D: Does not.
[00:11:48] Speaker B: Okay, one planty fist pummels into you. Kindly take 13 bludgeoning damage.
[00:11:54] Speaker D: I will kindly take that with compassion.
[00:11:58] Speaker C: In your heart.
[00:11:59] Speaker B: Vines start to wrap around you, but they don't get very far and that's going to bring us to zeros.
[00:12:06] Speaker D: I will recklessly attack the thing, mess it up.
[00:12:09] Speaker B: Me.
[00:12:10] Speaker D: After raging 19 to hit super hits twelve slashing, six radiant and seven fire.
[00:12:18] Speaker B: Fire doesn't seem to be super effective.
[00:12:21] Speaker D: Interesting.
[00:12:22] Speaker C: All right, we're in a swamp. It's really wet, but because this is.
[00:12:26] Speaker B: Slashing damage, you tear it open, you can see might constitute as a tum tum as bones sort of spill out of this thing by your feet. Please swing again.
[00:12:37] Speaker D: I would love to swing again. And it's tum tum.
[00:12:41] Speaker C: Technical terms.
[00:12:43] Speaker D: Yeah, 17 that'll hit. That's going to be eight slashing and six fire.
[00:12:49] Speaker B: That is going to bring us to our gaggle of NPCs, which are going to swing so many swords. An axe cracks into this thing as Max jumps on its back. Chem pulls two blades and does his whirlwind of death. And just trips over his own feet, dread backs up and fires a shot. They're hitting these plants. Very few of them seem to be finding purchase amongst the chunky wooden core of this creature and instead flap the branches around and knock leaves off of it. Creedon.
[00:13:24] Speaker A: Okay, I want to try something since it is mostly water. I want to try casting frostbite and it needs to make a constitution saving throw or it'll take some cold damage.
[00:13:37] Speaker B: It gets a twelve.
[00:13:38] Speaker A: Okay, that'll not do it.
It takes six cold damage.
[00:13:43] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:13:43] Speaker A: Does that seem to do more than like my eldritch blast did?
[00:13:47] Speaker B: The ice mostly cracks away. Your eldritch blast seemed to be more effective. That's going to bring us to Boulain.
[00:13:53] Speaker C: Bolane is going to do a rinse and repeat. She's going to do told the dead and spiritual weapon it's told the dead.
[00:13:59] Speaker B: Saving throw is a 14.
[00:14:00] Speaker C: Yes. Not enough. All right, so that does 17 necrotic damage and eleven plus 17 to hit with the spiritual weapon that hits. All right, it's twelve.
[00:14:14] Speaker B: The creature sort of collapses in on itself again. Plant vegetation goes everywhere and it begins just lying still again in the grass and is effectively indistinguishable from the area around it. But it has stopped fighting.
[00:14:30] Speaker C: Can we just make our way through with the boats and not go near the other two?
[00:14:36] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:14:36] Speaker C: Okay, we should do that.
[00:14:39] Speaker B: You make it to the further waterfront and get back into the water and you seem to be some sense of safer.
[00:14:46] Speaker C: It's Indescribable. They're waiting for us.
[00:14:49] Speaker B: Yeah, Indescribable is waiting. You see his little head just slowly bobbing as he sort of floats. Danger weed.
[00:14:55] Speaker C: Shambling mound is what we call.
[00:14:59] Speaker B: Shambling Mound.
This worked. Makes sense. We will continue on.
[00:15:05] Speaker A: Can Cretan attempt to get a short rest in during this next leg? I'm assuming that it's like yeah, Xeris.
[00:15:11] Speaker B: Can do all the rowing.
[00:15:15] Speaker A: I'm just going to pass these off to you, man. I'm sorry. Look at these arms. I rowed about five times and I'm.
[00:15:21] Speaker C: Tapped cretan made Zerus row anyway, right?
[00:15:25] Speaker A: She probably did a little bit and whined a lot about it and Kill Zerus just took over.
[00:15:33] Speaker C: She didn't directly whine about.
[00:15:34] Speaker A: She was like, this burns so much.
[00:15:42] Speaker D: Yeah, I'll do that.
[00:15:44] Speaker B: So you keep trolling along, lottie dotty DA and Indescribable pops up and says, you are reaching another hunting ground. They do not sit still like danger Weed. What is the word? Troll.
[00:16:01] Speaker C: Trolls?
[00:16:02] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:16:03] Speaker C: What do we know about swamp trolls?
[00:16:06] Speaker B: Roll me a nature roll.
[00:16:07] Speaker C: If anybody else gets a good nature bonus, I only get one. Oh, but that's an 18. Ha.
[00:16:12] Speaker A: Creedon just looks at Dread hoping he knows something.
[00:16:15] Speaker D: I also rolled an 18.
[00:16:17] Speaker B: I mean dread's smart. He's not good at nature per se.
[00:16:20] Speaker A: Creedon knows nothing about the outdoors.
[00:16:22] Speaker B: He's better at all other knowledge skills with an 18. Those of you who rolled fairly high know that trolls are big stinky. Regenerating fairies and swamp trolls are particularly smelly. You should be able to smell them well before you can see them if you're careful. They are, however, basically covered in vegetation and pretty good ambush predators. Although Indescribable has just told you that they are extra aggressive, they often are not alone.
[00:16:58] Speaker A: Can we try to stealth again?
[00:17:00] Speaker C: Are we able to stay on water to get through this area or is it going to be another land bar?
[00:17:05] Speaker B: You can stay on water or land, either option. You think land might be a tad faster, but not substantively.
[00:17:13] Speaker C: Okay, how big is this area?
[00:17:15] Speaker B: Imagine you're floating in the middle of the Everglades and a guy points all around you and says troll territory.
[00:17:24] Speaker C: So more than 60ft radius.
[00:17:26] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:17:27] Speaker C: Okay.
[00:17:27] Speaker A: I mean, I think that we just try to sneak through again if we can.
[00:17:30] Speaker C: Well, I could cast a darkness spell over us while we go through. They would not be able to see us, but we also would not be able to see us.
[00:17:40] Speaker A: I would be able to sense if we came up on something, though.
[00:17:44] Speaker C: This is true. Wait, do we even know that about Granny? Wait, you can sense?
[00:17:49] Speaker A: I had a really religious experience. I feel like I've developed some kind of 6th sense.
It's a divine mercy thing. You wouldn't understand.
[00:18:01] Speaker C: Wow. Boulain raises an eyebrow and says, you are years ahead of your time, Karedin. Should we do this then? Should I cast darkness and we go through blind, but they will also be blind to us?
[00:18:12] Speaker A: Yeah, we might bonk into some trees.
[00:18:15] Speaker C: I don't know.
[00:18:15] Speaker B: What's the duration of your darkness bomb?
[00:18:18] Speaker C: Ten minutes.
[00:18:19] Speaker B: You are going to cast darkness and probably book it then. Yeah, I need an athletics role from everybody who is going to row.
[00:18:27] Speaker A: Oh, good.
[00:18:28] Speaker D: All right. Without Credence help I got a 22.
[00:18:31] Speaker B: You were booking it.
[00:18:32] Speaker A: I wouldn't have helped.
[00:18:33] Speaker B: There is a wave of wasted sewage smell that hits you in the dark, but you make great time. Max is right behind you. Chom got hung up in some reeds and had to break loose, but he seems to catch up. Okay. And by the time the darkness spell wears off, the smell of just rank pot sewage seems to have passed behind you.
[00:19:01] Speaker A: Creedon has already tied a cloth with like prestige mint scent around her face.
[00:19:08] Speaker B: Indescribable pops his head up from the water and says, you will wish to camp? Yes.
[00:19:16] Speaker C: Yes.
[00:19:17] Speaker B: We are coming up on a spot. It is not so dangerous. Who's on watch around, let's say three in the morning?
[00:19:26] Speaker A: I will say Creden is never volunteering to be on watch. She only does it if somebody else asks her to.
[00:19:31] Speaker C: I think that would be a good time for Boulain. Just because she can see in the dark. So dead of night is a good time for her to be watching.
[00:19:37] Speaker B: Boulain, you're awake? Give me a perception roll, please.
[00:19:41] Speaker C: Oh, not great. Shit. That's an eleven.
[00:19:45] Speaker B: Okie dokie, Boulain. There is a large splash of water. A shout and then it goes quiet. And by the time you turn around, whatever happened is gone.
[00:19:58] Speaker C: Okay, what does she do? I think she wakes up Dread.
[00:20:04] Speaker B: Dread does what Dread does immediately rolling a perception check. And he says the water is still right over there. The splashes are centered on that spot. And he points to a spot happens to be the last place you saw Indescribable.
[00:20:20] Speaker C: I'm wondering if another lizard man got him or if it was something bigger.
[00:20:24] Speaker B: I mean, it could have been something much bigger.
[00:20:27] Speaker C: Okay. Should we wake up the others?
[00:20:29] Speaker B: Dredd's gonna roll a nature check.
[00:20:32] Speaker A: Crayden was like clinging onto Dread when you tried to stir him. Just being like, no, don't move.
[00:20:39] Speaker C: She got a five on nature.
[00:20:40] Speaker B: Dread says, because of how quiet it is. I think it's an ambush predator. Let's wake them up, but don't let them move much yet.
[00:20:50] Speaker C: She'll let him do Max and Chom, and she will wake Zuris and Cretan, and she will wake them with fingers on their lips to make sure they don't move.
And Creedon goes.
[00:21:03] Speaker D: There'S a problem.
[00:21:04] Speaker A: It's been established that Creedon is an ugly sleeper.
[00:21:08] Speaker B: Dread says there's something in the water. I think it got Indescribable and it.
[00:21:14] Speaker C: Might be quite large and ambushy.
[00:21:17] Speaker A: Can Creedon sense anything through, like, our tent, I assume, or whatever structure we are in?
[00:21:23] Speaker B: So your blind sense goes out 30ft?
[00:21:26] Speaker A: Yeah, 30.
[00:21:27] Speaker B: Yeah. There is something right on the edge of your blind sense. It's in the water. It's big.
[00:21:32] Speaker A: How big?
[00:21:34] Speaker B: You can't quite feel the whole thing. You'd have to move towards the edge of the water to get your blind sense to engulf the whole thing. But you can definitely tell that from here. It's bigger than a person.
[00:21:45] Speaker A: Creedon will share that. Whatever it is. It's big, but I can't tell how big. But it's not moving.
[00:21:51] Speaker B: Seems to be waiting. It's about 30ft from you. You're about 10ft from the beach.
[00:21:57] Speaker C: I could cast dancing lights out there and see if it comes up for them. Should still be far enough away that it will not affect us.
[00:22:05] Speaker A: This would be a good chance to use my ghostly gaze. But I don't have dark vision. It won't help me.
[00:22:10] Speaker C: Should I do that?
[00:22:11] Speaker D: I'm good with that.
[00:22:12] Speaker B: Let me see if something happens.
[00:22:14] Speaker C: It's at least 20ft out. I think she's going to cast it 40 or 50ft out.
[00:22:19] Speaker B: A rocket of a tongue breaks the surface of the water, shoots directly out and slaps your dancing lights kind of zipping through them and then sucks directly.
[00:22:34] Speaker C: Back in it's like a frog. That is one hell of a frog.
[00:22:39] Speaker A: Is this the all frogger?
[00:22:43] Speaker B: He actually spends all of his days trying to cross roads.
[00:22:46] Speaker C: He's trying to cross roads, not getting hit by trucks.
[00:22:49] Speaker B: Yeah, this is a tough gig.
He's never been hit, though.
[00:22:55] Speaker D: As long as we stay on the land here.
I don't know that we need to mess with this. If it comes up here and makes its appearance known, then we'll deal with it then.
[00:23:05] Speaker C: All right. It is a shame about indescribable.
[00:23:08] Speaker D: It is. But what actually do you propose we do about it?
[00:23:12] Speaker A: Oh, no.
[00:23:13] Speaker C: All right. We will watch.
We will wake you up if it decides to come up on shore so bad.
[00:23:21] Speaker A: We have two more days here. He was very helpful.
[00:23:24] Speaker C: He was very helpful and very sweet. Although you would have had to cast your suggestion spell on him again in the morning.
[00:23:29] Speaker A: I mean, I don't know if that's true. It seemed like there might have been a willingness. I don't know.
[00:23:34] Speaker B: You'll never know.
[00:23:35] Speaker C: We'll never know now because he's dead.
[00:23:37] Speaker B: That's the downside of a suggestion spell. So morning rolls round the water's surface has not been disturbed. Everything looks exactly how you left it. Eerily quiet, cretan on the edge of your vision. You can sense it is still in the water on the beach near your canoes.
[00:23:55] Speaker C: Can we get around it?
[00:23:56] Speaker B: You can abandon your canoes.
[00:23:59] Speaker A: That's not an option. I'm not stomping through this muck.
[00:24:04] Speaker D: I mean, we were carrying our canoes for a large portion of us anyway. Why don't we just carry them a little further?
[00:24:10] Speaker A: It sounds like it's near enough to our canoes that we probably couldn't get our canoes without being in danger.
[00:24:16] Speaker B: You will walk towards it to get your canoes.
[00:24:19] Speaker A: I think we just need to take care of it. Okay, we ready.
[00:24:25] Speaker D: I'm ready.
[00:24:27] Speaker C: I think if we could get by it without provoking it, that would be ideal. It might be asleep by this point. If it is a nighttime hunter, I.
[00:24:34] Speaker A: Think it's too dangerous. I think that we should take the chance to get the jump on it.
[00:24:37] Speaker D: Both have their benefits.
[00:24:41] Speaker A: Break our tie.
[00:24:43] Speaker D: I'm for trying to go around without combat. I don't think we want to invite fights.
[00:24:50] Speaker C: Agreed.
[00:24:51] Speaker B: Run to the beach, grab the canoes and run back and then go to the other side and blow it away.
[00:24:56] Speaker C: Yep, let's do that. Let's try that.
[00:24:58] Speaker B: Who's going to run to the beach and grab the canoes?
[00:25:00] Speaker D: I am. One of the people doing that.
[00:25:02] Speaker C: The strong people will be doing that.
[00:25:04] Speaker A: Max and Chom.
[00:25:06] Speaker B: Max, Chom and Xeris are going to do this. Is this a stealth run or just a speed run?
[00:25:12] Speaker D: Speed run, I think.
[00:25:13] Speaker A: Just a speed run. I also want to give a guidance to Max.
[00:25:18] Speaker B: Go ahead and give me athletics rolls for Xeris. I'll roll for oh, Jesus. Oh, no, it's good. It's good news.
[00:25:26] Speaker D: Okay, I'm going to go ahead and rage.
[00:25:29] Speaker A: Are you not going to guidance?
Oh, yeah, I'll guidance. I thought that you would give yourself and I don't care about Chom.
[00:25:38] Speaker C: I care about Chom because I have to row if he dies.
[00:25:42] Speaker A: That's true. And I do need to find love for him.
[00:25:45] Speaker D: So I do have guidance.
[00:25:47] Speaker C: I'm told I am not going to love Chom.
[00:25:51] Speaker A: Oh, no, not you.
I learned something in my upbringing.
[00:25:58] Speaker B: Max darts, grabs this canoe with one hand, flips it over his head and is back in no time. Charm tries to replicate. This comes up just a little short of Max. You grab the canoe and start to run. And that's when something comes out of the water. You're just a tad slower than it. It will get one attempt to do something?
[00:26:22] Speaker D: Sure.
[00:26:23] Speaker B: A tongue rockets out of the water and tries to grab you. It rolls a natural one.
[00:26:31] Speaker A: Excellent. What a loser.
[00:26:35] Speaker B: This tongue rockets 30ft slaps the back of the canoe. Sticky frog gunk fly everywhere. But in the end, you're just a little faster than him.
[00:26:49] Speaker C: And then does not come out of the water.
[00:26:51] Speaker A: Except our guide.
[00:26:52] Speaker B: It does not come out of the water.
[00:26:54] Speaker C: Okay, let's just go around completely agree.
[00:26:59] Speaker D: Let's go.
[00:27:01] Speaker A: Well played. Good job, gentlemen.
[00:27:03] Speaker C: Do not know. All right, Nate, what are we avoiding next? Without a guide? That's sad about. I was really liking indescribable.
[00:27:11] Speaker A: Gave him a cutesy name and everything.
[00:27:13] Speaker C: That's why you killed him, isn't it? Because we called him indescribable.
[00:27:16] Speaker B: So you run to the other side of the thing, you hop in the boats and you get going. About ten minutes of riding away from your spot ahead pops up and you recognize Indescribable.
[00:27:27] Speaker C: Oh, you're not dead.
[00:27:28] Speaker A: He didn't kill our NPC.
[00:27:31] Speaker B: The frog god tried to eat me.
[00:27:35] Speaker A: Is that the all frogger?
[00:27:37] Speaker B: How to describe this creature? It came from your lands to the swamps long ago. It is not right.
[00:27:46] Speaker C: Did it come out of the thorns?
[00:27:49] Speaker B: I have never left the swamp.
[00:27:50] Speaker C: There is a place where things seem to get mutated out of their natural forms.
[00:27:58] Speaker B: This creature has how do you say eels. Eels coming off of it.
[00:28:05] Speaker C: That sounds like a thorns creature.
[00:28:07] Speaker A: Well, it's good that we made it away. I'm so happy that you made it and also don't want to run off from us or other things. That's great.
[00:28:18] Speaker B: It did not expect my shape changing.
[00:28:20] Speaker C: You have a shape changing power?
[00:28:23] Speaker B: I am a priest of all, father, as you call it. Green man.
[00:28:29] Speaker C: Well, we are pleased to make your acquaintance twice over.
[00:28:34] Speaker B: Only the strong survive out here.
[00:28:37] Speaker A: Can I ask what is your other shapes in case we lose sight of you?
[00:28:43] Speaker D: Crocodile fishes? Crocodiles?
[00:28:45] Speaker A: Oh, that's good to know.
[00:28:47] Speaker B: I turned into big crocodile. Not fit in frog's stomach.
[00:28:51] Speaker D: Very smart.
[00:28:52] Speaker A: How big of a crocodile?
[00:28:53] Speaker B: Frog very dangerous. I swim away.
[00:28:56] Speaker A: Clearly we made the correct call there. No thanks to me.
[00:29:01] Speaker B: He splashes up out of the water a little bit and says you heals. You have herbs.
[00:29:08] Speaker C: What kind of herbs?
[00:29:09] Speaker B: So he lifts himself out into one of the canoes again. The canoe is way over stuffed now. It's only meant for two people, but he has a broken leg and a broken tail and these huge sucker marks run down his back.
[00:29:21] Speaker C: Lulain will cast cure wounds on him.
[00:29:23] Speaker B: Roll me a medicine check, if you would be so kind.
[00:29:26] Speaker A: Oh, good. I was worried that we would have to use the potion of healing and I was like, I only have two, and we're about to fight a dragon.
[00:29:31] Speaker C: Oh, that's not great. That's a ten.
[00:29:33] Speaker B: I mean, you can set his tail and his leg. It's a painful process, but you get it done. And then you sort of heal the wounds.
[00:29:40] Speaker C: Yeah, that's eleven points of nods and.
[00:29:43] Speaker B: Says you good at heals.
[00:29:45] Speaker C: It is not my primary skill, but it is something I can do. Yes. My skills are more for the people whose wounds could not be healed.
[00:29:56] Speaker B: You worship all consumer.
[00:29:58] Speaker C: Is that a nice name for the silent judge?
[00:30:01] Speaker B: I mean, you've never heard it before. Okay, do you ask him that? Yes, your judge.
[00:30:08] Speaker A: Oh, I thought that he just didn't like capitalism.
[00:30:11] Speaker C: All consumer.
[00:30:13] Speaker D: Let's table this discussion for later.
But I'm intrigued and I'm starting to get disenchanted.
[00:30:25] Speaker B: We must avoid next hunting ground. All right, great.
[00:30:30] Speaker D: Let's go around.
[00:30:31] Speaker A: I will trust your judgment.
[00:30:33] Speaker B: Very dangerous. We go around.
[00:30:36] Speaker D: Seems like the right plan to me.
[00:30:38] Speaker B: You add a couple of hours to your trip, but you do not go through the next hunting ground.
[00:30:42] Speaker C: Do we get to know what it was?
[00:30:43] Speaker D: Very dangerous.
We go around.
[00:30:47] Speaker B: You wrap around. It is towards the end of day three when you see not one, not two, but twelve heads pop out of the water. About 100ft from you and indescribable ducks underwater.
[00:31:05] Speaker A: Those are the other ones, I gather.
[00:31:07] Speaker C: These are not the green man's lizard men.
[00:31:10] Speaker B: That sounds righteous.
Settle down, apprentices. Wands away. It's time for the history lesson. Today we will talk about the fascinating case of the ORC. Before the era of astrogarian, Contessa and the Empire, orcs were a brutish tribal folk who worshipped a one eyed god they called Groomsch, lord of Slaughter. Supposedly, Grooms was the ORC creator god in their faith. He came from another land and found this one and raided it. Lost his eye fighting with the Elven gods and his fallen blood seeded the land with what became known as the Orcs. Now, not all Orcs were raiding Slaughtering warriors. They had lesser gods as well, like the Denmother, a kind of champion of motherhood and protection. But the strong did rule, and the warriors and their fascination with Groomch, the one eyed god drove them to greater conquests against the humans, elves and dwarves. Like all conquests, though, despite early successes, they eventually spread too thin and the tide turns. Astragarian Contessa united the human tribes of men and formed an empire and an army, she single handedly stopped the ORC leader and slew him in a field of combat. The Orcs were not one to retreat. Or surrender. The casualties to the warriors were high. The snowy mountains at the edge of the Eastern Empire and the uncharted Great Wastes became a field of red. A sad outcome, but a necessary one. The survivors of what is now called the Battle of Grumpsh's Folly was a great turning point for the Orcs or, as we call them now, the ORC blooded. It was this battle that brought the Elves into the Empire and converted them to the true faith as the people of the Luminous One, the surviving Orcs, intermingled with humanity and now, half a millennia later, are spotted only by the occasional prominent brow and jaw or enlarged teeth. A small group known as the Peer Orcs fled to the Uncharted Wastes and were never seen again. Presumably lost to a land with no food or water. Now, it's common knowledge that the Orcs were once Fae who came to this world historically reserved for humans to flee the oppression at the hands of the Fay Lords. Resources were scarce and so they immediately went to war with the Elves and Dwarves raiding for supplies. It is likely their leader was a powerful Fay named Grumpsh. This account has been disputed by the Fay themselves who have no record of anyone named Grumpsh or even of Orcs. And there is no Fay magic or heritage detectable in their bloodline today. In recent times, a new theory has emerged that the Orcs were an alchemical experiment by a Fae who adopted groomsh as a kind of guise and that perhaps they were once human. This is a theory at least collaborated by the ease with which Orcs and humans were able to intermingle and produce offspring. The ORC blooded are not rare, but their ancestry has left them with a legacy to overcome. And as such, many have joined the faith with the greatest fervor. We are the learned here, apprentices. And our embracing of this people is a testament to the ability to reclaim Orcs from the vile experimentation that was thrust upon them. We saved the Orcs in a sad but necessary way. It is our duty as those who know the history to continue to help them thrive. And someday they'll be indistinguishable from anyone else. Now, back to work.
So a lizard folk head pops up from the water and begins nonchalantly swimming towards you. It comes within about 30ft of the front of your boat and then it says something. Does anybody speak Draconic?
[00:35:11] Speaker D: I speak abyssal. And I do believe I speak Draconic as well.
[00:35:14] Speaker A: Oh, man, no.
[00:35:16] Speaker D: Draconic is not on my list unless it comes from nodig. It's abyssal and celestial.
[00:35:20] Speaker B: Okay, so he starts talking and notig starts whispering in your ear. So you're getting a delayed translation. Okay, this lizard man says, you are very strange. We have not traded with you before. Who are you?
[00:35:36] Speaker D: He says, we're very strange. And if they've not traded with us before, who are we?
[00:35:41] Speaker C: You speak this language?
[00:35:42] Speaker D: Yeah, this is Draconic.
[00:35:44] Speaker C: You speak Draconic?
[00:35:45] Speaker D: Yeah, I'm a lawyer. I speak several different languages. Draconic. And Abyssal and celestial.
[00:35:52] Speaker C: I had no idea Draconic was part of the Astragarian law school regimen.
[00:35:58] Speaker D: Well, it's an extracurricular course.
[00:36:02] Speaker C: Vlane looks dubious, but says, well, at least one of us can understand them.
[00:36:06] Speaker D: We're travelers coming through the land to.
[00:36:09] Speaker B: See what riches it has to offer in the water. It blinks for a second or two and then it starts to speak. And again you hear this whisper in your mind, Zerus, as it says, you must be a powerful spellcaster to speak into my mind like this.
[00:36:26] Speaker C: What did he say?
[00:36:27] Speaker D: He said I have to be a powerful spellcaster to speak into his mind. What do you mean, to speak in your mind like this? I'm uttering sounds, am I not?
[00:36:35] Speaker B: Again, there's a brief delay, and he says, you are uttering sounds. Yes, but you speak the lizard tongue in my mind, yes.
[00:36:46] Speaker D: I will speak Abyssal when responding to him.
[00:36:49] Speaker B: Yeah. So you switch to Abyssal and he goes, oh, you speak the mother tongue.
[00:36:54] Speaker D: I am well traveled.
[00:36:56] Speaker B: Impressive. How may we be of service or assistance to you as you have arrived in the domain of the bisonth, the silent fang tribe in common?
[00:37:06] Speaker D: Do we want to say we just want to pay homage to bisonth or.
[00:37:10] Speaker C: Do we have anything worthwhile to pay homage with?
[00:37:14] Speaker A: Man, if only I didn't get robbed by that harpy.
[00:37:21] Speaker D: I mean, our hats are all right. We made sure we had all right hats.
[00:37:26] Speaker C: This is true.
[00:37:27] Speaker D: Or we can just I mean, they're probably going to watch us.
[00:37:30] Speaker C: We have some gold. It is not much for a dragon, but perhaps it might help.
[00:37:36] Speaker D: You said you had traders. You have wares to trade and goods.
[00:37:40] Speaker B: To barter when you switch back to Abyssal? He says, yes, we trade food to the exiles of the Northern Kingdom.
[00:37:47] Speaker D: Can we come join, trade what we have and see what's available?
[00:37:51] Speaker B: Trade would be acceptable at this time. Come. And the creature turns and starts swimming away from you.
[00:37:59] Speaker D: So I've told him we'll go to the trading area and see what to trade.
[00:38:06] Speaker C: Fair enough.
[00:38:07] Speaker D: Honestly, buying a little time and getting a little recon. All right, I'll start paddling that direction.
[00:38:12] Speaker B: So you are paddling along. You're a little slower than the lizard folk can swim, but they humor you. And you eventually arrive at a sizable land mass with various nature constructions. Old school, bushcraft style huts have been set up, little long houses and you can see definitely behind them, the swamp gets weirdly thick and there is a preponderance of centipedes and spiders and weird stuff hanging in the vegetation and there's bubbling in the water in places. But as long as you're on this side, everything seems normal. And you arrive at a village, essentially, you see lizard men all again dressed in makeshift clothing designed from various mosses and leather straps and things. And they invite you in there's a longhouse. They wave you over.
[00:39:12] Speaker D: Okay, I'll go over to Longhouse and see what's going on there.
[00:39:15] Speaker B: In the longhouse, there is a lizard man who is much larger than the rest of them and has this rainbow colored frill of not clothing, actual lizard frill around his neck and up the back of his head. And he hears you all speaking Abyssal and says, welcome. I assume you are here to trade. What is the nature of these people? And the lizard man who came in with you says, they are here to trade. They are not exiles. And so the frilled lizard looks over and says, okay, again, in Abyssal. What do you come to trade with?
[00:39:53] Speaker D: I have an axe. And what else do we have? Let's see.
Anything you all want to put on a trade?
[00:40:03] Speaker A: Nothing I really want to give up.
[00:40:06] Speaker C: I mean, I have two healing potions, but I don't really want to.
[00:40:09] Speaker A: Yeah, I have a couple of potions.
[00:40:12] Speaker D: All right. Well, I have this beautiful limestone mall. I have a good sized ruby.
[00:40:19] Speaker A: Wait. We want that mall, don't we? Yeah.
[00:40:23] Speaker D: We're not going to trade it. You're offering it up for who wants a limestone mall? Nobody wants a limestone mall. It's fine.
[00:40:29] Speaker A: I don't know. It's kind of cool.
[00:40:33] Speaker B: So this lizard man nods and says, yes, we are in need of weapons. Metalworking is not common among our people. Please show me your wares. We have some things to trade. Our Lord Bisonth has taken all of the coinage and gems, but we can offer you a variety of foodstuffs and herbs, the bounty of the swamp.
[00:40:59] Speaker D: So the Lord Bisonth takes away your ability to defend yourself.
[00:41:03] Speaker B: He permits us to keep weapons, but he removes from us coins, gold, gems, things we might use to purchase these things. We must instead barter.
[00:41:14] Speaker D: See, I'm going to translate to would.
[00:41:17] Speaker C: You prefer to have your own gold?
[00:41:20] Speaker A: Hey, quick question. Do any of you have locate object? I don't remember what level that is.
[00:41:24] Speaker B: Three I believe.
[00:41:25] Speaker D: I don't have locate object.
[00:41:26] Speaker A: My thought was that if we did have it, I could possibly trade them my signet ring, and then we could later locate it or something like that. But because a ring would probably be taken by Bisonth eventually to the lair.
[00:41:37] Speaker C: Yeah, I might have locate object available to me, but we'd have to wait till tomorrow.
[00:41:42] Speaker A: Well, we wouldn't need to locate it probably today. Unless Bison just swings by. And if that does happen, I hope that we aren't here.
[00:41:50] Speaker D: No, it's a good plan. We should find out if we can enact that. I'll go now. Put the axe on the table. The axe that I seem to not be using anymore.
[00:41:57] Speaker B: He gets really excited when the axe hits the table. He walks forward and his frills pop up, and he says, this this is beautiful. May I?
[00:42:07] Speaker D: Yes.
[00:42:08] Speaker B: And he reaches out to grab it.
[00:42:09] Speaker D: Yes, thank you.
[00:42:10] Speaker B: He picks it up, tests the weight, and says, this is quite fine. I will trade for this. And he sets it down on the table in this long house and says, what might be worthy of such an item?
[00:42:23] Speaker D: What is on your trade? You have no gems. You have no money. We are not in need of food.
[00:42:29] Speaker B: He nods and says, Let me see what I can do. And he walks to the front of his longhouse and shouts something again in Draconic and again nodek, whispers in your ear, bring me the hidden stash from Bison.
And a lizardman comes running with a little wooden chest. It looks like it was clearly not made in the swamp. It's something they have traded for with exiles in the past. And he pulls the chest in and sets it down and pops it open. And he has a fair amount of expensive looking jewelry gold, silver. Some gems are on things. And he picks through this. It's a small chest. It's not big, but he picks through it and says, I would trade you items such as these. And he turns it towards you and picks out a necklace that looks like it might be worth maybe 200 gold.
[00:43:19] Speaker D: Hey, no Dig, which one do you like?
[00:43:21] Speaker B: No Dig says, Isn't that axe magic?
[00:43:24] Speaker D: This is my basic great axe.
[00:43:27] Speaker B: Oh, it's not the silver great axe.
[00:43:29] Speaker D: You got is this is the original great axe.
[00:43:34] Speaker B: Oh, good. Yeah.
[00:43:36] Speaker D: No, it's not that one.
[00:43:37] Speaker B: No Dig says, oh, good. My eyes aren't very good because I'm a weapon.
[00:43:45] Speaker A: What a great character.
[00:43:47] Speaker B: That silver chain looks wonderful.
[00:43:49] Speaker D: I'll take this more simple silver chain. It looks more my speed, more my style.
[00:43:55] Speaker B: He nods and says, excellent. And he hands you the silver chain and then takes the axe and sets it over by a larger chair in the corner and then comes back and says, this is a great trade and a good day for us here. May I ask what I can call you?
[00:44:10] Speaker D: You can call me Xeris.
[00:44:12] Speaker B: Xeris?
[00:44:13] Speaker D: Yes. In Abyssal, it was my understanding that the great bisonth was sovereign of these lands, but you seem to have some disagreement with that. If you have a secret stash.
[00:44:27] Speaker B: I am old enough to remember the time before Bison came here.
We had a dragon demigod, a great red dragon. He crafted great red drake beasts that guards his temple.
He was quite impressive.
[00:44:50] Speaker D: I can imagine.
[00:44:52] Speaker C: Claire and I are smiling wickedly.
[00:44:57] Speaker B: His name was?
Mm hmm.
[00:45:01] Speaker D: Spawn of nodig. Sure might have heard of him.
[00:45:03] Speaker B: Yes. You know of nodig?
[00:45:05] Speaker D: Yep.
[00:45:06] Speaker B: Excellent. No Dig bisonth has removed us from the temple of nodig. We can no longer worship the Draconic greatness, and he has declared himself not a demigod, but a god and taken from the tribe all of the things that he deems of wealth.
[00:45:24] Speaker D: Well, I think we can agree that those that are not gods should not call themselves gods.
[00:45:31] Speaker B: I agree, but Bisonth is too powerful to disagree with.
[00:45:39] Speaker D: What if the tribe had.
[00:45:43] Speaker B: What? No, wait. And he looks at the lizard man who's standing there, who guided you, and he says, you. You will not speak of this, or I will cut out your heart. And the lizard man nods. And then he says, and now you will leave. And he nods again and starts walking out, leaving you alone with this.
[00:45:59] Speaker D: I I'll let that go.
[00:46:02] Speaker B: He says, you may call me Guidoel. Guido is fine if your tongue struggles.
[00:46:07] Speaker D: Guidoel is a fine name.
[00:46:09] Speaker B: I am a priest of Bisonth, but before bisonth, I was Prince and king of the swamp.
[00:46:18] Speaker D: Cool.
[00:46:19] Speaker B: If you wish to be an ally, perhaps we could help each other.
[00:46:24] Speaker D: I am wondering how we can help each other.
[00:46:27] Speaker B: Bisonth is away hunting big game.
[00:46:30] Speaker D: That makes sense, from what I understand. If you could show us to the temple, that would probably be the help we need. If you had another plan, I'm open to hearing it. Go on.
[00:46:41] Speaker B: I will tell my people you are pilgrims of Nodic.
[00:46:45] Speaker D: Great.
[00:46:45] Speaker B: They will take you to the temple.
[00:46:47] Speaker D: Okay.
[00:46:47] Speaker B: I hope you can swim. Bisonth has made some upgrades.
[00:46:52] Speaker D: We're going to find out if we can swim. We're going to need about a minute to prepare for any lengthy swimming, but we should be able to do that.
[00:47:01] Speaker B: The servants of the temple will respect you as long as you follow them. They will take you to the shrine to nodig. There are, of course, significantly more elements to the lair of Bison. Once you're inside, I care not what you do, so long as you leave the lizard folk alone.
[00:47:23] Speaker D: Aren't the guides going to have a problem with us exploring?
[00:47:27] Speaker B: I'm sure they will, but they are not lizard folk.
[00:47:31] Speaker D: Oh. What are they?
[00:47:33] Speaker B: Creatures born of bison's magic.
[00:47:35] Speaker D: I see. All right. How far away is Said temple?
[00:47:42] Speaker B: With your canoes, we could get there in about an hour.
[00:47:45] Speaker D: All right.
[00:47:47] Speaker C: Much of this has Zurus been translating?
[00:47:49] Speaker D: I'm trying to translate everything because it's a great question. Everything? That is like they have a temple. We can get into it by saying we're pilgrims. They'll lead us to it. They'll be guards. Not guards. They'll be guides. He's cool with us doing whatever we want, except hurting lizard folk. And he's also against bisonth. He was king. He would love to be king again. And he wants his shrine cleared. I'm not mentioning that the shrines of nodig we're just dropping that. That'll probably come up later, but we're not mentioning that in this conversation. But aside from the nodig component specifically, everything else is okay.
[00:48:27] Speaker C: Can we have a huddle?
[00:48:28] Speaker D: Yeah, we should. We should definitely have a huddle.
[00:48:30] Speaker C: Okay. Boulain says, I have an idea. Expanding on our previous idea. If Bisonth is not around, is his horde in this temple yes.
[00:48:41] Speaker D: His horde is so we can get.
[00:48:42] Speaker C: To his horde, we can take something from him, and then we can tell Guidoel that after we're gone after we're gone for three days, guidoel should snitch on us for having stolen from Bisonth.
[00:48:56] Speaker D: That's not going to be a problem unless I'mistaken bisonth will know where his treasure has gone, much like the locate object spell that we were considering using the other direction.
[00:49:11] Speaker C: Also, as it happens, I do have locate object. It's a level two spell, so I was looking at the wrong list. But I do actually have locate object, for what it's worth.
[00:49:18] Speaker A: Good to know.
[00:49:19] Speaker D: So it's my understanding that no one will need to snitch, because he will just know. He may even know wherever he's at right now when we take something that it's gone.
[00:49:30] Speaker C: So we will need to be quite quick and get the hell out of here once we have done that.
[00:49:37] Speaker D: Yes. So generally, the plan right now is this sneak into well, be guided into the shrine, figure out what happens in the shrine. I'm still two minds about that one. Leave the shrine, find the horde in what should be Bicenthalayer, take stuff from it, and then leave as quickly as possible. That was generally the plan that was forming.
[00:49:59] Speaker C: Billy looks at creedon. What do you hmm.
[00:50:02] Speaker A: I mean, I think that's a good just how are we going to outrun a dragon again?
[00:50:06] Speaker D: The dragon's not here.
[00:50:08] Speaker A: Yeah, but if they convince that something is missing, they could possibly get here. Very right.
[00:50:15] Speaker D: All right.
[00:50:16] Speaker A: I was looking it up. I was really hoping that non detection was on your spell list, but it is not.
[00:50:22] Speaker C: Or pass without trace.
[00:50:24] Speaker A: Well, non detection would mean that no divination magic could be used on the thing that we steal.
[00:50:30] Speaker D: We are going to run quickly for three days. Well, I was about to say maybe it's a good idea to have myself and Dread go ahead with whatever items, just in case Bison ends up faster than we can handle. But, yes, traveling two of those days, at least without rest, is probably advisable.
[00:50:51] Speaker A: But then we're going to be exhausted for the fight.
[00:50:53] Speaker D: Well, that's why we travel two days, and then we hopefully get at least a little rest before we have to fight.
[00:51:00] Speaker A: This is so dangerous.
[00:51:01] Speaker C: You have two per canoe. We could sleep and row alternately. Although, sure, the three twigs in the group are not going to row as efficiently as the earlier folks.
[00:51:12] Speaker A: I mean, there's also the chance that we run into the Allfather on our.
[00:51:15] Speaker D: Way back, too, though that's probably the big game Bicenth is hunting, so I don't think that's actually on the menu. I don't know.
[00:51:23] Speaker C: I mean, if we were to run into the Allfather on the way back, that would probably be great because he would tangle with bison and let us get away.
[00:51:33] Speaker D: It's amazing, because, you see, the Allfather eats us, and then Bison's treasure is in the allfather, and then they have no choice but to fight.
[00:51:45] Speaker A: By the way, I am so happy that we aren't having to fight these lizard folk. Not yet, yes, but I spent my whole youth in the city. Everything I read, I kind of thought that lizard folk were a little more like monsters. Apparently, it was a very biased view. They seem really nice. I can't understand these guys.
[00:52:00] Speaker D: But you do not understand how many times I've had to stop my hands. And the only reason that there are not dead lizard folk right now is because there's a large pile of gold at the end of all this. But they've been nice heretical at every turn. Yes, they absolutely have been.
[00:52:21] Speaker C: They are heretical for astrogarian principles. However, they are living in the swamp.
[00:52:27] Speaker D: With all the exiles so exiling someone to show them that they have done wrong by society. They don't think, oh, I should learn how to be more civilized in the untamed area. They think I should just go completely wild.
[00:52:43] Speaker C: We throw them out here and we give no care to what happens to them or what they do unless they come back.
[00:52:51] Speaker D: It looks like those with similar mind are willing to take care of them.
[00:52:54] Speaker C: I am of a mind to let the lizard folk be the lizard folk out here where we do not care about our own.
[00:53:00] Speaker B: As I said, that was what they.
[00:53:03] Speaker A: Asked of us in exchange, that we leave them be.
[00:53:08] Speaker C: This is purely transactional and opportunistic.
[00:53:11] Speaker D: Absolutely. And there's sufficient motivation for me to not change that agreement.
[00:53:17] Speaker A: We're doing this.
[00:53:18] Speaker C: All right? So to the temple we will go. We are doing this. And I guess we will play it by ear once we get inside, because we have no idea what we're going to find.
[00:53:28] Speaker D: So we're going to have to paddle out there before we meet the guides. I want to drink our potions.
[00:53:34] Speaker A: I thought that we were trying to save our potions for the actual fight with Bison.
[00:53:38] Speaker D: Yes, but we're going to need to swim to get through this, man. And I'd rather have dodgy potions around the layer of a dragon than when actually fighting a dragon.
[00:53:51] Speaker C: It's true.
[00:53:51] Speaker A: It's just that they only last for an hour. So if Bison gets the jump on us in the water, we are screwed.
[00:53:58] Speaker D: It's going to be rough, that's for sure.
[00:54:01] Speaker C: I have a few tricks with water if it comes to it. Well, I have one I can do each day.
[00:54:07] Speaker D: It's that or we're going to need to swim proficiently. And some of us can't do that. I look straight at creedon.
You're lucky you never got walk the plank as part of your pirating experience. That's all I'm saying.
[00:54:25] Speaker A: You know, maybe if you approach things with a bit more friendship and a bit less eggs, you also wouldn't have the walk plank experience.
[00:54:32] Speaker C: Here is another thought, if the lair is empty and we do not have to fear bison being there right now, what if Zerus, Creedin and I drink a potion and go in and leave Max, Dredd, and Chom with the boats? Then we have three potions when we come back out because we have six potions total.
[00:54:51] Speaker D: I like that idea.
[00:54:52] Speaker A: Are they okay with that, though?
[00:54:54] Speaker D: Dread chomp. Any input?
[00:54:56] Speaker A: I mean, I feel like we're all one team, but we are technically two teams, and it's tough to say, hey, we're going to go into the heart of a dragon, but you guys stay out here.
[00:55:05] Speaker B: Dread says, I'm not going to be useful out here. I can't read their lips or their faces.
[00:55:11] Speaker C: Then take my potion and I will stay out with the boats.
[00:55:14] Speaker D: I like that plan a lot less.
[00:55:16] Speaker B: The danger is inside.
[00:55:18] Speaker A: They did say that there was going to be more to getting to the horde. I suspect that, yeah, staying together may be smart.
[00:55:26] Speaker B: Max chimes in, says, how about we go see what we're dealing with before we drink the potions? It doesn't look like we're hard for quick decisions right now. They're going to let us talk it out.
[00:55:36] Speaker D: All right, let's go, then.
[00:55:37] Speaker B: So you folks head out to the canoe. Two lizard folk come to guide you. Neither one of them has the big frill around their neck. They don't speak a language that you seem to share, so they just gesture.
[00:55:49] Speaker D: All right.
[00:55:50] Speaker B: But you boat after them, so the swamp gets a little funky. Over the course of the next hour, you see little piles of bubbling acid centipedes the size of your arm, gigantic, super thick foliage everywhere, and occasionally you spot an acid pocked skull of some creatures, some of them looking bizarrely humanoid, disconcertingly humanoid.
[00:56:20] Speaker C: Can I do a nature role on the weird stuff, like the enormous centipedes and sure. The stuff that we're seeing? That's really OD.
[00:56:29] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:56:30] Speaker C: I'm not surprised to see skeletons, but arm sized centipedes are a little that's an eleven.
[00:56:36] Speaker B: An eleven something is definitely affecting the natural order here, and it is not natural. That's what you get with an eleven.
[00:56:44] Speaker D: Should I make a check, or can I talk about what's going on?
[00:56:47] Speaker B: You can talk?
[00:56:48] Speaker D: Yeah.
I don't know why I forgot about this. Dragon's layers. They're not just the home of a dragon, right? Dragon layers. The dragon affects the nature of the world where it sets up home. And so what you're seeing is the effect of a black dragon living in close proximity to this land.
[00:57:09] Speaker C: Do we have to worry about his control over the land and these creatures as we are making a break for it?
[00:57:17] Speaker D: Yes and no. If we're in direct conflict that's why you don't want to fight here, because if we're in direct conflict, he will absolutely be able to use this to his advantage in an unnatural way. The other problem is, again, totally forgot pools of acid are bad for anybody, so be careful.
[00:57:35] Speaker A: Sirius, you seem to know so much about dragons. Was the skeletal dragon not your first rodeo? Have you done this before?
[00:57:42] Speaker C: No, he did the research in the library in Turtle Bay.
[00:57:46] Speaker D: Yeah, I did. Right when we were reading about bison.
[00:57:50] Speaker C: While we were busy talking about fairy deals on the no.
[00:57:55] Speaker B: What were you talking about?
[00:57:57] Speaker A: Nothing. Sorry. I was a little distracted that day. I think you just told me everything in one ear and right out the other.
[00:58:04] Speaker D: That's fair. So as long as we're careful, watch where we step and Bicent isn't around, it should be no more dangerous than quicksand. Quicksand is it is, but no more dangerous.
There's a certain level of not dangerous with quicksand when you're standing away from it.
[00:58:23] Speaker A: Who's in the canoe with Creedon?
[00:58:25] Speaker C: Zuris, I think.
[00:58:27] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:58:27] Speaker A: Okay. Well, Zuris, while we're having this discussion, creedon is hanging onto your arm very freaked out by all of the big bass bugs.
It's making it kind of hard for you to row because obviously Creedon's not rowing.
[00:58:42] Speaker C: Every now and then, she reaches out to grab an ore and whack something away.
[00:58:46] Speaker D: That's what they're good for.
[00:58:48] Speaker B: So these lizard folk who are pulling you along, they stop, basically. And the swamp water has gotten incredibly obscured and almost festering looking. But there is this patch about the size of a dragon that seems perfectly clear and goes down noticeably into some sort of cave structure that you would clearly have to go underwater to get to. You also notice in the thick vegetation, there is stonework. Some sort of runes are hidden underneath this vegetation.
[00:59:24] Speaker A: While we're coming in here, can Creedon ritual cast detect magic?
[00:59:28] Speaker B: Sure. The whole land glows with a faint magic, the effects of which are transmutation in origin. That's all you can pick up on. Also, you remember, Xeris'glave is very lightly magical. It's very angrily magical right now. It's bright as shit.
[00:59:48] Speaker A: Oh, is your weapon did it get stronger when we recently did? That's crazy.
[00:59:54] Speaker D: Is there something going on?
[00:59:55] Speaker A: Because I can't see just is that also transmutation?
[01:00:01] Speaker B: Nate the magic on that?
[01:00:03] Speaker C: It is.
[01:00:05] Speaker B: What would it be?
You're detecting transmutation divination and necromancy on.
[01:00:14] Speaker A: The just I cast detect magic and everything around us is transmutation, but I don't know. I've seen your glave before. It's obviously magical, but I don't know. It's really bright in my you know what detect magic is? Like, things glow a little bit, but it's like really yeah.
[01:00:36] Speaker D: No, that's nifty. I have to take a look at that.
[01:00:39] Speaker A: I mean, nothing's good against dragons, right? This seems great.
[01:00:42] Speaker D: Yup, this is gonna be great.
[01:00:44] Speaker A: Yeah, this is awesome.
[01:00:45] Speaker C: Boulain during this exchange, goes totally stone faced.
[01:00:50] Speaker B: Creedon's an idiot.
[01:00:52] Speaker C: Like, noticeably stone face. She doesn't say anything, but she's looking hard.
[01:00:58] Speaker D: That's impressive for wearing a veil.
[01:01:00] Speaker C: Oh, that's true. She does have her veil on. She goes very still you're always stone faced, always blank.
[01:01:08] Speaker B: So the lizard men have stopped and are just treading in this clear spot. And after a couple of seconds, two small lizard creatures come out. They're about maybe 3ft tall from head to tail, maybe 4ft with their tail stretched out. They are swimming up and they surface, and they have dark lizard scaled an onyx colored, glistening look to them, but they're small. They have tiny little lizard faces with tiny little lizard teeth. And one of them pops up and says, excuse me, how may we be of service?
[01:01:42] Speaker D: Did lizard men not answer that question?
[01:01:44] Speaker B: This little creature is speaking in common and the lizard men do not seem to understand.
[01:01:47] Speaker D: I see. We have been guided here to we're pilgrims see to tograms yes, we're pilgrims.
Yes, we're pilgrims. Not toegrams here to see the temple.
[01:02:03] Speaker B: It is a short swim. Hold your breath for 20 seconds.
[01:02:09] Speaker D: Oh, can we hold our breaths for 20 seconds?
[01:02:11] Speaker A: I have moderate feeling that I could do that.
[01:02:15] Speaker C: I believe I should be able to do that, yes.
[01:02:17] Speaker D: All right. Guess we will follow you down.
[01:02:20] Speaker B: It nods and says, yes, follow me.
[01:02:23] Speaker D: All right, let's go, everybody.
[01:02:25] Speaker B: And it swims like a lizard down this tunnel.
[01:02:29] Speaker D: I swim like a barbarian with some armor, so at least I sink well.
[01:02:33] Speaker C: I swim like a cleric, fully dressed.
[01:02:36] Speaker A: Kaden grabs Dredd's hand and then jumps in with him, but is like, Help me find my way down there. I'm not good underwater.
[01:02:43] Speaker B: Yeah, so Dredd's not an amazing swimmer, but he gets there. Max and Chom are fucking stellar swimmers. Max, being half naked all the time, is doing great.
[01:02:52] Speaker A: So hydrodynamic.
[01:02:54] Speaker B: And you swim through a lovely little tunnel. It's pretty short. It's sort of down and up, but it definitely hides the entrance really well. And you come up and arrive in a large underground opening. It looks like it used to be some sort of auditorium. It's got stone walls covered in carvings of various dragons and lizard like creatures in all directions. There's a large opening headed maybe northish and another large opening heading south. But it used to have, you can tell, stairs that you would come down into this area from above and just large boulders are piled up in that spot. And there's this dome of earth running over the top of this old auditorium. It's dark in here. There's a little faint light reflecting down where these big stones are blocking what used to probably be the entrance. And the only other thing you see, aside from these two smaller lizard men is two large lizard creatures. One of them looks to be about the size of a dog, only it has a lizardesque exoskeleton and weirdly long legs for a lizard. Again, the exoskeleton is black, like onyx or obsidian. And then there is a much larger lizard. This one looks to be you'd probably describe it about the size of a small. Brown bear. It's covered in vegetation and vines with mystical looking thorns protruding out of it in all directions. Underneath the vines, it appears to have green scales and looks pretty menacing.
[01:04:41] Speaker A: Honestly, creedon still has detect magic running. Anything new with these things?
[01:04:46] Speaker B: All of these creatures detect a little bit of magic transmutation.
[01:04:51] Speaker D: Okay, is this it, or are we headed somewhere else?
[01:04:54] Speaker B: One of these little dragon creatures looks over at you and says, I am the sorcerer supreme of the temple of Bicenth. Please follow me to where you may pay your homage. And he trots along the soggy ground towards the north entrance.
[01:05:13] Speaker A: Creighton wants to roll inside on this?
[01:05:15] Speaker B: Sure.
[01:05:16] Speaker A: No, Creedon isn't totally convincing or being bled into a trap that is only a ten. Yeah, it seems above board.
[01:05:26] Speaker C: We're in a dangerous place.
[01:05:28] Speaker B: I mean, you think if you do what you're told, you'll probably be safe.
[01:05:31] Speaker A: Yeah, that's what I've done most of my life.
[01:05:33] Speaker D: Seems good.
[01:05:42] Speaker B: And that is our show. Don't forget to leave us a rating and review. Special thanks, Todd Ferguson and my pet machine for our Tunes and Juliet elaborate flight of fancy for our logo. Support your local artists. What will our heroes find as they wander through the wild swamplands, home to monsters and exiles alone? Find out next time on Carrots and suffering at the India Odyssey.